


Boundaries (Female!Hange Zoe x Female!Reader)

by celestialuna



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Hange's gender is a mystery, M/M, Modern Royalty, Occasional He/Him Pronouns for Hange Zoë, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, She/Her Pronouns for Hange Zoë, Slow Burn, They/Them Pronouns for Hange Zoë
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-17 01:35:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 40,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29463609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celestialuna/pseuds/celestialuna
Summary: A commanding officer who soldiers refer to as Sir and a daughter from a distinguished bloodline who’s heart screams to be more than what she is destined for. What happens when they meet at the grandest ball of the year?A story of truths buried deep within lies, of discovering new sights and love together. A story where boundaries will continue to be crossed.
Relationships: Hange Zoë & Reader, Hange Zoë/Original Character(s), Hange Zoë/Original Female Character(s), Hange Zoë/Reader, Hange Zoë/You, Levi Ackerman/Erwin Smith, Levi/Hange Zoë
Comments: 65
Kudos: 106





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> The idea came to me while reading this book set in a time of war. I honestly don't know how well I'll be able to execute this but I do hope that you will all enjoy parts of it! Please be nice as English is not my first language so there will be grammatical errors here and there. Enjoy!

Isabel digs her foot a bit more to her horse's side, hoping that it'd speed up the hill where the place she called home sat atop. Their home was surrounded by vast amounts of land, on most days, Isabel would take her time to enjoy the sun setting as the breeze hit her skin but alas, that was not a luxury that she had today.

Today was the night of the grandest ball of the year hosted by their family. The noble house of Black was a name known across districts; for being a noble, but also for their generosity and willingness to support the people. Alistair Black, the man of the house, was born into privilege and has been served a silver spoon all his life but that thankfully did not erase his humanity as he remained kind and down-to-earth. The same could not be said unfortunately about his wife, Lady Black _basked_ in their riches and loved to throw parties for the elites. A play to flaunt their wealth but with a subtle agenda to find worthy men for her daughters.

Astoria, the eldest, was a clever lady whose remarks has managed to make men grow mute with no reply; A beautiful lady with luscious locks of golden hair to go with her wit. Eleanor, the youngest of the three was a year shy of being of marrying age, she was just as beautiful as Astoria and with time, perhaps even more. Lastly, Isabel Black. There are plenty of ways to describe Isabel but none could quite encompass her character to its best. Isabel had much tanner skin compared to her sisters from spending so much time basking under the scorching sun, light freckles danced across her cheeks. Isabel lacked Astoria's elegance and Eleanor's innocence; she has spent more time reading books in their library as well as playing soldier while riding her horse - Her heart did not belong in the elegant life they were destined to live but rather longed for the thrill and freedom that outside of the walls had to offer.

She longed to be part of the fight but alas, women were not allowed in the military. It was a cruel world to live in; Men were expected to provide and/or fight while women were destined to serve and accompany their husbands. Yet despite society imposing such rules, she blatantly refused to be part of that narrative. From the day she reached marrying age, she has made it her goal to be as undesirable as possible to every man who invites her to dance at social gatherings, scaring them off with a _light_ step on their foot or teeth smeared with lipstick. In short, Isabel Black was a headache her mother had no choice but to deal with. Isabel simply wouldn't have it any other way.

She could get away with a lot of things with her mother, except for this, being late to their own party was inexcusable and would surely have severe consequences; Lady Black was not afraid to lock the library or take her horse away, Lady Black could easily take away the little sense of freedom she had left so here Isabel was praying to the universe that she make it on time. As her horse approached the back of their mansion, she hops off of her horse and sprints in through the back door in hopes that her mother would not catch sight of her in her muddy white day dress and hair that had scrunched up in several places. As she reachers the doors to her room, she opens and instantly shuts it behind her, "Miss Isabel, where have you been?!" Daisy, one of their maids says with panic as she reaches Isabel in seconds and begins to untie the laces in her day dress, "I couldn't help it, Daisy. Did you see the sunset today?" She says with excitement.

"I'm afraid I didn't, Miss. Lady Black has been quite demanding today."

"As she always is when there's a party." Daisy doesn't reply, focused on getting Isabel out of her day dress.

A muffled voice from the hallway breaks the silence, "Inspection time!" Lady Black announces.

Isabel groans as she brushes her unruly hair, hoping to take out the knots in her hair. Daisy made it possible to get Isabel in her gown of the night in mere seconds since hearing the lady's call. Isabel wore a blue off-shoulder gown that displayed her collarbones and chest, it hugged tightly across her waist accentuating her thin form. With one last look, Daisy nods and opens the door for Isabel. She briskly walks towards where her two sisters are already standing, hoping that her mother did not notice her slight tardiness.

Lady Black observes Astoria and Eleanor first, a smile graces her face, clearly pleased with her daughters' appearances. But as Isabel enters her view, Lady Black visibly inhales, closing her eyes.

"Did I not ask you to powder Isabel's face more?" Lady Black asks Daisy directly who was standing behind the three while brushing Isabel's hair away from her face, her hand getting caught in a knot, making Lady Black's face show disdain.

Daisy nods before bowing her head to avoid Lady Black's stare. Isabel knew her mother well, she was aware how merciless she could be. She was relentless to her own daughter and Isabel could not begin to imagine just what consequences Daisy would face because of her.

"It's my fault, mother. I told her not to do it." Isabel says grabbing her mother's attention.

"Well, you will do best to follow my orders. Am I understood?"

Isabel shivers due to her mother's tone before nodding in understanding. "The first guests will be arriving in a few minutes." She announces before walking away.

The three let out their held breathes as Astoria approaches Isabel and clasps their hands together, "I told you no more dilly-dallying for today, Isabel." Astoria slightly scolds.

"You're beginning to sound like mother." Eleanor teases, wrapping her arms around Astoria's waist, resting her chin on Astoria's shoulder. The eldest rolls her eyes at Eleanor's remark.

"Just wait til mother drags you along for her daily ventures. You'll have to endure the same fate then."

Eleanor shakes her whole body to show her terror at the mere idea of spending a whole day with their mother, "Why doesn't Isabel go with mother?"

"Because, little one," Isabel starts, cupping her sister's cheeks. "Mother would rather fall on horse shit than spend a whole day with me." She grins.

The three giggle at Isabel's statement before a faint voice cuts their conversation, "I'm sorry to bother you, Missus. But I was hoping to finish getting Lady Isabel ready for the party before the guests arrived." Daisy says timidly.

Isabel smiles at her, "Of course, Daisy. Come along then." She says walking back to her room, she sends her sisters a flying kiss before disappearing back into her room.

"Well, Daisy. Do your worst."

Daisy giggles, "Missus, your mother will faint on the spot if I do so."

"God forbid we make Lady Black faint. Her fragile heart just won't make it!" Isabel grins as Daisy continues to help her get ready for the night's affairs.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He/him pronouns will be used in this chapter and a pairing with an age gap will be presented in this chapter. If any of that makes you uncomfortable, feel free to exit and skip this chapter!

A considerable amount of time had passed since the Black family had last hosted a party. Alistair felt it inappropriate to celebrate while most people cowered in fear of the Armored and Colossal titans' return. It was only a matter of time before Lady Black would begin to throw a fuss however and as such, Alistair agreed to throw a grand ball to pacify his wife. He only had one condition he asked of his wife which was to allow him to invite soldiers from the three regiments, Lady Black's horrified look at her husband's demand brought a few giggles to the three daughters who watched the conversation unfold. Isabel in particular exchanged those elated giggles for a dismayed look upon hearing her mother speak so lowly of the soldiers especially those from the scouts regiment.

"I will not have a bunch of dirty, sweaty men ruin our party!" She huffed.

Alistair let out a sigh and suggested a compromise, one that Lady Black easily concurred to, and so Alistair Black was allowed to invite soldiers from across the three regiments though _strictly_ those of high and authoritative rankings only. Isabel was ecstatic to meet these men, particularly those in the scouts regiment, as her curiosity about the sight beyond the walls grew with each passing day.

In hindsight, Isabel should've known better than to be at ease with her mother's easy compliance. She scolds herself for being so relaxed when the matter was at its most important moment so she can do nothing but simply watch as the commander of the military police, Nile Dok as he introduced himself, offered his hand to Eleanor as an invitation to dance. Eleanor's quick glance to the side met her mother's steel eyes who was watching the situation unfold. Eleanor knew that declining the man would subject her to an earful nagging from her mother and thus a sweet smile graced her face as she took the man's hand and sauntered to the spacious dance floor with him.

It had been a few hours since the first wave of guests arrived, wearing elegant gowns and dashing suits for the occasion. Lady Black was delighted to see her friends and acquaintances she kept for social status' sake. Astoria, Isabel, and Eleanor chose to enter through the back door which the servers used to prevent much warrantied attention to themselves but after having used the trick a handful of times, people have come to expect the three daughters' entrance from said door. As such, upon entering the well-decorated hall, pearly white smiles accompanied with piercing gazes welcomed the three. Isabel easily detached herself from her sisters' side as men began to walk towards them, particularly Astoria.

Astoria had a way of enticing people to look her, she quite enjoyed being the center of attention. Growing up under their mother's strict gaze, Astoria learned social cues and manners at an early age; She knew how to flatter people in order to enchant them deeper with her presence and she _knew_ \- much better worded as gifted - how to put out an insult while remaining sweet that no one could possibly detect the venom unless she allows for it to be heard. Astoria was a double-edged sword; sweet and compliant with their mother's orders but manipulating the rules to her own liking.

Isabel watched the two with hawk-like intensity, prepared to stomp on the man's foot should he try any funny business with her younger sister.

"My my, doesn't he seem too old for Eleanor?" Astoria says, settling to stand beside Isabel.

Isabel rolls her eyes, "He doesn't _seem_ too old. He is too old." she corrects.

"I must say this is an awful choice, even for mother." Astoria remarks, the insult towards the man showing just a little.

"Eleanor still has months before she is of marrying age. This is ridiculous, Astoria."

A familiar man enters her view, stopping in front of Astoria. She immediately smiles upon seeing him, "I was beginning to wonder where you were."

He gently holds her right hand and presses a kiss to it, "I apologize for making my lady wait."

Isabel loudly groans at the affectionate display the two were showing in her presence, " _Please._ Just go dance elsewhere already." she says, desperately walking away from the two.

She could feel all the eyes on her, she'd gotten used to it at this point but that didn't make it any less revolting. Many have offered their hand throughout the night but she has given none the satisfaction of gaining the privilege of dancing with her. It was the only prideful revenge Isabel could get on her mother for the time being. It had become obvious that the party, the easy compliance her mother had given had the hidden motive of finding her daughters a suitable man and Isabel absolutely loathed the idea of being tied down to a man. She'd rather live with no value to her name than be married to a man who would inevitably take away what slither of freedom she had.

She walked along the shadows, her eyes never leaving Eleanor and Nile who were conversing while dancing. Despite Eleanor's calm exterior, Isabel knew all her tells; the slight twitch of her finger, the strained veins on her arms, while it was easily overlooked by other people, Isabel had spent her whole life with her sisters that the tells were displayed transparently to her to show their inner emotions. Isabel knew that Eleanor would very much like to be escorted away from the man but Isabel's hands were tied, heaven knows what Lady Black would do if she intervened a moment that looked harmless to most of the guest.

She settles within the shadows, leaning her body on the pillar beside her while keeping her arms crossed in front of her chest.

"How offensive of mother to let her daughter dance with such a repulsive-looking man." She says under her breath.

"His looks are just the tip of the iceberg, unfortunately." A voice speaks up beside her, Isabel visibly jumps, not expecting someone to hear her.

She looks the person up from head-to-toe, confusion finding its way on her face. "Don't you think it a little rude to start conversation without making your presence known?"

"Forgive me, Missus. I thought you were aware of my presence, after all, I settled here first."

Isabel raises an eyebrow, "I apologize. I did not notice your presence beforehand. Had I known, I would've chosen a different pillar."

The mysterious person whose figure is embraced by the shadows smiles at her snarky remark, "As you wish. I'll leave you be now."

The person pushes off the pillar with ease but before they could begin to walk away, "Wait." Isabel calls. He turns towards her with a quirked eyebrow.

"Entertain me."

"And how would you like to be entertained, Miss?"

Isabel turns for a second towards Eleanor before properly fixing her gaze back on the mysterious man. judging by the gashes on their neck - mostly concealed by the collar of their white dress shirt, the fixed stature, and the formal way of speaking; Isabel rightfully assumed that this man was one of the military officers her father had invited which meant they must've known a bit about the man dancing with her sister. "What do you know about him?" She asks, directing her attention to the man.

"Nile Dok? He's the commander of the Military Police."

Isabel rolls her eyes at the answer, "Thank you for your _valuable_ information." She replies sarcastically.

The person smirks, amused with her, "I rarely have to interact with the MPs, I apologize if my answer was not to your standard."

"Why are you standing here alone?" Isabel asks, changing the topic altogether.

The person sheepishly smiles before answering, "I'd much prefer not to garner attention to myself."

Isabel nods, fully understanding and sympathising with the man.

"I share your sentiments, Sir..." Isabel ends her tone in a wondering manner.

"Zoë. Commander Zoë, Miss." He says with a bow to her, he looks up from where he is bent to give her a playful smile that Isabel couldn't help but return.

She grabs the edges of her gown which is flowy at the bottom and curtsies towards him. "It is an honour to be in your company, Commander Zoë."

They share a giggle before proceeding to lean on the same pillar while engaging in a stimulating conversation, one that revolved around sending whispers of judgement directed at Nile Dok of the Military Police Brigade.

From where Astoria had settled after dancing with her man, she catches sight of Eleanor who is still unfortunately dancing with the much too old man. She scans the room for her other sister and as she finds her by the shadows smiling, she smiles to herself. _She seems to be enjoying herself._ she says thoughtfully, Isabel rarely enjoyed these gatherings and opted to stay in hidden areas to avoid as many inviting suitors as possible. Moving her gaze just the slightest bit, she notices that Isabel was in the company of another and that they were enjoying each other's presence, talking of something unbeknown to Astoria. Her eyes widen just the little bit before returning to her elegant gaze, "Isabel enjoying the company of a man? Oh the walls must be rumbling in surprise." She mutters to herself before walking across the floor, attracting the longing stares of the men she passes by.


	3. Chapter 3

Erwin, Levi, and Hange sat in a carriage on the way to the ball currently undergoing in the House of Black. It had been obvious from Lady Black's words that she was quite fond of Erwin most especially, giving Levi and Hange no more than a glance during her visit to their headquarters. Hange didn't usually tag along for these gatherings but Erwin had insisted that she needed this time away from the experiments and paperwork they've all been engrossed with for weeks now. That's how they ended up in this situation; Erwin chatting merrily to no one in particular, Levi giving him nothing more than a side glance and a permanent annoyed look on his face, and Hange with an elbow propped on the edge of the carriage, looking at the moon and taking in the serene view.

"Hange," Erwin calls, breaking her focus. She turns to look at him in acknowledgement.

"While I did say that you should use this time to relax and de-" Hange doesn't even allow Erwin to finish his thought as she already knew what he was about to say.

"Be cautious. Don't garner attention. _The usual._ I know, Erwin." She recites the words she's said a thousand times. Erwin nods with an apologetic smile before leaving her to her sightseeing once more.

As they reach the manor, it took everything in Hange to not gape and scream her admiration for the structure. It was a finely built house that looked similarly like the ones she had seen in her books. As the three entered, Erwin was immediately smothered by Lady Black; being the gentleman he is, he engaged her in conversation as Levi immediately strayed away, not wanting to get caught up in conversation with these people. Hange had the same idea as her goal of remaining unseen to most of the guest came to the front of her mind.

After walking a bit further into the room, Hange settled in a rather darker location in the grand hall, leaning against a pillar while surveying the faces of the people inside. Most of them wore elegant gowns with silky cloth or crisp suits to show off their wealth. Hange felt incredibly underdressed in that moment, glancing at her choice of worn out pants and the white dress shirt she had worn all day. She felt out of place, like she didn't belong here; A feeling that had recurred time and time again upon joining the survey corps and soon becoming a section commander under Erwin's complete utter trust in her.

 _Trust._ What a daunting word. Hange cannot fathom how Erwin completely trusted with her own command despite the lie of a life she lived. It irked her to think about it and that shame is a burden she brought with her on a day to day basis.

She silently stayed put in her place, successfully not gaining the attention of anyone until a woman catches her eye as said woman practically sends a death glare to the dance floor and leans on the other side of the pillar she's on.

The woman mutters insults under her breath, loud enough that Hange could hear it and couldn't help the smile that graced her lips. Not being able to restrain herself any further, she responds to one of the girl's many quips and gains the sight of a stumbling mess of a woman who clearly did not notice her existence in the first place. So much for not garnering attention.

After a while more of conversing with Isabel as she had introduced herself, the two had moved further inside the room, straying further away from their initial spot.

The girl who Hange now knew to be Isabel's sister approached them with wide eyes, "Please. keep me away from him." She practically begs.

Isabel laughs and affectionately pats her sister's cheeks, "Commander, this is Eleanor. My younger sister." she introduces.

Hange lightly bows, putting her hand on her chest, "A pleasure to meet you, Miss Eleanor. I'm Commander Zoë."

Eleanor giggles at her antics, "Do men usually bow to women?" Eleanor asks her sister.

Isabel considers the question, looking up for a second before looking back to her sister, "No, not those I've encountered at least."

"It's a habit of mine I suppose is the best way to answer your question, Miss Eleanor." Hange adds.

"Well, I do like that habit of yours. it's cute in a way." Eleanor compliments.

"What's cute?" A voice joins in. The three turn towards the voice who reveals to be Astoria making her way to them.

"Commander here likes to bow as a means to greet people." Isabel informs.

Astoria raises a curious eyebrow, "Is that so, Commander?"

 _Yeah, so much for don't garner attention._ Hange does it one more time in Astoria's direction, looking up to offer her a smile, "It is an honour to be in your presence as well, My Lady."

Astoria smiles, "I don't mean to stay long. I'm simply here to call Eleanor, it seems mother would like for you to meet some of her _old_ friends."

"But why doesn't Isabel have to go?" Eleanor complains. Isabel giggles at her sister's childish behavior, "I've already met them. They're not quite fond of me."

"Oh you're too unique for their taste, sister." Astoria says, holding Eleanor's hands beginning to walk away.

"Just say it as it is! They think I'm weird!" Isabel quips at her sister's retreating forms.

Hange looks quizzically at her, confused how anyone could not like Isabel. She has known her for hours and Hange has been more at ease in her company than anyone else.

"Lady Isabel, may I ask you something?"

Isabel turns her head and motions a nod, "What do you mean when they say they're not fond of you? What don't they like about you?"

"You've seen my sisters. You seem like a smart person, connect the dots."

Hange pinches her chin with her thumb and index finger in thought, "I must admit there's nothing quite different about you and your sisters as far as I've seen."

"Aww so you think I'm ladylike, Commander?"

Hange looks at her with confusion, "Are you not?"

"You must not see women often due to your job but yes, I'm not quite the epitome of femininity and elegance to put it simply."

"And that is a problem?" Hange genuinely asks.

Isabel nods, "To my mother who's one goal is to marry her daughters off? It's a disaster."

Hange nods sombrely taking in the information, "If I may, and I truly hope I don't offend you or your mother... But I'd much prefer a headstrong, not-so-ladylike woman as yourself rather than a woman whom I'd fear would break even with the lightest of touches."

A blush creeps on Isabel's face and she quickly turns to hide her face from the commander. She clears her throat, regaining her composure, "Mind if I ask you something as well?"

Hange simply nods. "Dance with me." Isabel says in declaration rather than a question.

Hange's eyes widen at her straightforward demand, "Shouldn't I be the one to ask you that?"

"It never crossed your mind to ask me in the first place."

Hange grins shyly at the call out as she rubs her neck, "I'm afraid you're not wrong about that."

"So how about it? Can I interest you in a dance, Commander?"

Erwin's orders suddenly breach Hange's mind as she sighs, "I'm afraid, I can't entertain you to a dance as much as I would like to."

"And why is that?"

"I... I have orders not to gain too much attention to myself. I can't disobey my superior's orders." Hange says apologetically.

Isabel is deep in thought for a moment before a smile reaches her face, "I know just the place."

And with that she grabs the commander's wrist, noting how incredibly slim it was as her hand wrapped perfectly around it - being a soldier, she assumed that the commander would have a much thicker built physique but didn't question it further. Isabel dragged Hange by the hand, remaining in the dark shadows as they exited the main hall to the destination Isabel had in mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have any thoughts or hopes for future chapters, please feel free to comment! I'd love to hear your ideas. <3


	4. Chapter 4

Isabel ignored the puzzled looks servants sent their way as she continued to run towards her destination. She never thought she'd be one to run away with a man but tonight simply held many surprises for her.

She isn't quite sure what compelled or drew her to the commander but she couldn't deny that he was much more tolerable compared to others. The sons and men raised alongside them were taught manners just as much as Isabel and her sisters were, however, no amount of lessons could teach them how to treat a woman with equal respect. To Kasius, Astoria's beau, and many men who enjoyed the party women were all the same - a pretty little accessory to flaunt at social gatherings, someone who could stroke their ego, women were expected to serve their husbands while those fools grinned and flaunted their riches.

Commander Zoë was unlike any man she had ever come across. He was refined though had his awkward moments, His physicality was rough around the edges and calloused as a product of serving in the military, He stood out in many ways though what really differentiated Isabel's perception of him from the other men was his words. She's known educated men all her life who could make women swoon with their words just like Astoria but Commander Zoë's words presented genuine thoughts, never empty in its intentions but conveyed what he deeply thought and felt. The Commander was truer than any man Isabel has ever known and she was entranced by him.

She slows down her pace upon seeing the glass door that led to her destination, turning around with a smile, "We're almost there." she informs.

Hange simply nodded, amused with the lady's excitement. She glances towards the wrist which Isabel tightly held and couldn't help the warmth that spread in her chest.

As they stepped into what Hange recognized as the terrace of the manor, she couldn't help but stare in awe at the way the place was perfectly placed to be under the moonlight; The lamps hanging on the walls, glistening under its serene light. "Isabel... this place is..." she looks up to meet the lady's eyes and feels the same warmth in her chest multiply, "beautiful." Hange all but breathes.

Isabel grins widely, approaching Hange. She holds the ends of her dress and curtsies once more, "How about that dance now, Commander?" she looks up from where she is bending to meet Hange's shocked but amused face.

Hange nods, bowing in response, "I'd love to dance with you, Missus."

Feeling bold enough, Hange takes the initiative to take both of Isabel's hands, placing one on her own shoulder and holding the other gently, she brings the latter near her face for a moment before placing a soft kiss on it, her eyes never leaving Isabel's.

Isabel's breath hitches in her throat at his actions but does nothing to stop him, she offers him a smile, "Dance under the stars with me, Commander."

"As you wish, My Lady."

The two began to waltz to the mellow sound coming from the grand hall, their eyes never leaving the other's.

“I'd appreciate it if you didn't call me that. That’s what Kasius calls Astoria as if to claim her as his property. _I refuse to be anybody’s property,_ I am my own.”

“My apologies. I never meant to claim you in such a distasteful manner though I must ask what would you like me to call you if not that?”

Isabel ponders on the question before a smile appears on her lips, “My Light.”

“My Light?” Hange repeats in question.

She nods her head with glee, “As if to say that as you walk in the shadows, I am your singular brightness.”

Hange couldn't help the chuckle that escaped her lips, "Such a way with your words, _my light._ " she tucks a strand of Isabel's hair that had flown to the middle of her face as the wind blew.

No more words were exchanged as the two sauntered across the vast area, nothing seeming to matter but the glints in their eyes and the way their hearts beat in sync. Isabel had one rule she wished to follow tonight; To not let anyone have the pleasure of accompanying her in a dance and yet as her light steps and dress flew in an airy manner, feeling his hands burn on her skin, his eyes never relenting on hers for even a second, Isabel came to the conclusion that Commander Zoë was an exception.

\------------------------

Astoria took one more glance across the room, hoping to find her sister, _"Where'd you go, Isabel?"_ she mutters worriedly under her breath.

Eleanor tensely holds Astoria's hand, successfully getting her attention, "Found her." Eleanor announces.

Astoria doesn't bother to reply, patiently waiting for Eleanor to answer her unspoken question. Eleanor looks beyond Astoria, directing her attention to one of the windows that had a clear view of the terrace. The terrace where Isabel and the commander were currently at, dancing with no care and knowledge that the people in the grand hall could see them clear as day.

From where she stood, Astoria could see the faint smile that graced her sister's beautiful face. She was no stranger to seeing her sister smile but this one showed a different emotion; nothing about it seemed forced or measured, it was genuine and without care. A smile that went perfectly well with her sister's character. She couldn't resist the smile that tugged at the corner of her lips, seeing how genuinely happy her sister was in the company of the commander.

Her smile displayed a truer side to her sister that not many have seen; the playful and innocent side of her that their mother forced her to mask away. Isabel shined brighter than she ever has and Astoria couldn't help but be thankful for the man who brought out the child in her sister that she had so dearly missed.

As the two danced, Astoria couldn't help but notice the way they stared adoringly at each other.

“Oh? who is that?” Lady Black asks, noticing her two daughters watching the scene unfold at the terrace. She was pleasantly surprised to find Isabel in the arms of a man but chose not to show it at the moment.

“A commander from what I heard. It must be one of those military men father invited.” Astoria answers.

“I make a fuss to make sure she dances with Erwin Smith and she ends up with a nobody?”

Astoria fights off the eye roll and playfully calls her mother out, “Oh hush, mother. Even if they’re a nobody to you, surely they’re of respectable rank in the military. After all, _you_ made sure that only higher officials were invited. Besides, Isabel chose this one of her own free will.”

"Oh really?" Lady Black says her tone showing a hint of amusement.

"It seems your daughter has finally become enchanted with a man, mother." Astoria offers, holding Eleanor's hand and walking away from Lady Black who continued to stare at the two.


	5. Chapter 5

The walk back to the grand hall was spent in silence, neither wanting to break the serene moment and more than happy to just enjoy each other's presence.

Upon entering the hall, Hange's eyes immediately found Levi who conveyed an unspoken message which Hange knew all too well. Years of working together and friendship allowed for the two to converse without words, their eyes saying everything that needed to be said. Hange was just about to walk out of people's sight when a tug at her sleeve reminded her that she was in the presence of another. Hazel orbs stared at her in question, Hange sighs regretfully, "It seems my time is up for the night, Miss." she informs.

The slump of Isabel's shoulders is enough for Hange to know that Isabel was disappointed that their time had to be cut short.

"Will I see you again?" She asks, a hint of hope showing in eyes.

Hange simply smiles, aware that this may be the last time they meet. "If the universe wills it, we will. Goodnight, Lady Isabel."

Hange takes hold of Isabel's hand and presses a gentle kiss before walking back into the shadows where she and Levi reside for the remainder of their stay.

"Had a nice dance?" Levi asks in his monotonous tone.

Hange's eyes widen a fraction before regaining her composure, "Quite a lot. Maybe you should go ask Erwin to dance."

Levi looks at Hange, his face not giving away whatever he was feeling but Hange _knew_ exactly what his face meant.

They went back to their comfortable silence, watching Erwin who was still in Lady Black's company be escorted to her daughter, Isabel.

Lady Black introduces Erwin to her daughter as Erwin takes Isabel's hand to place a kiss on it. The same hand that not a few minutes ago Hange had kissed as well.

"Not even a few minutes later and you've already been replaced? _damn, that's rough._ " Levi comments.

Hange rolls her eyes at his statement before replying with her own, "Now now, no need to be so jealous. Erwin simply held and kissed the lady's hand, Levi."

She could hear Levi's 'tch' which satisfied her mischievous side and decided to leave him to gloat.

They watched as Erwin led Isabel to the dance floor and spent a good while dancing to the music while having small conversation.

To Hange, Isabel seemed to be quite enjoying herself, smiling at whatever Erwin was saying as her eyes sparkled with interest. However, on the other side of the hall was Astoria and Eleanor who were also watching the scene unfold, knowing well that it was all part of the act. If anything, Isabel was simply being polite and behaving the way their mother had taught them.

It may have seemed fairly genuine to most but to Astoria, it was all an act, one she was all too familiar with as she had done the same with men time and time again.

"Lady Black must be pleased that she's dancing with the commander." Eleanor inputs.

"She should be pleased as it is that Isabel agreed to dance with him with no more than a huff."

Eleanor laughs at her sister's teasing before focusing back to the dancing pair. "I prefer the other one. Her smile was much better with Commander Zoë."

Astoria smiles fondly at Eleanor's comment, "Me too, El. Me too."

As the pair finish dancing, Isabel rushes towards her sisters, her tense shoulders immediately slumping once out of people's sights.

" _Please,_ can we leave already?" a hint of desperation evident in her voice.

Astoria giggles, brushing Isabel's hair out of her face before placing her hands on her cheeks, "It is socially acceptable to leave now though I would've expected you to go looking for Commander Zoë again?" she questions with a raise of an eyebrow.

Isabel's cheeks turn a shade of red, facing her head to the side to avoid her sister's gaze, "Why would I look for him? He must've left already."

"Nope," Eleanor says. "He's right there with Commander Erwin." she points out to the corner where three people were currently at.

Isabel's eyes widen, "You danced with Commander Zoë's friend and superior? that's harsh, Isabel, even for you." Astoria giggles at her own sentence, Eleanor joining in.

Isabel slaps her sister's arm, "Oh stop it, Astoria! I had no idea."

"So who was the better dancer?" Eleanor asks, receiving a glare from Isabel.

"I think the better question is who would Isabel rather dance with." Astoria corrects, her eyes displaying a knowing glint.

"Neither. Because I will never dance with a man again for the rest of my life." Isabel announces firmly, walking a bit forward from where her sisters stood, her voice growing fainter with each word.

"Well then, if you're so adamant about not dancing anymore perhaps we can leave now." Astoria suggests.

Isabel doesn't respond, her eyes focused on the thin figure with messy brown locks. Astoria places careful hands on Isabel and whispers into her ear, "you should say goodnight to him, who knows when will you two see each other again." Isabel nods at her suggestion and briskly walks towards the retreating figures of the three men.

Just as Erwin was about to leave through the front door, Isabel screams, "Commander Zoë!"

The trio turn towards her, saluting as they do. "May I speak with Commander Zoë for a moment... alone?"

Erwin looks at his companion before offering a smile to Isabel, "Of course, M'lady. We'll be in the carriage." He says the latter to the commander.

Hange approaches Isabel, "is there anything I can do for you, Miss Isabel?"

"You didn't say good night." Isabel replies without much thought.

Hange stares in confusion, "I'm pretty sure I did."

Isabel mentally scolds herself for replying without so much as thinking about what to say, it was true, the commander did in fact say good night as his parting words.

"I..." she wasn't sure where to go with this conversation. Hange's hand finds her own as he gently squeezes it, "Are you alright, My Light?"

Isabel smiles at the term of endearment, "I'm fine. I just wanted to say good night, commander."

Hange offers a smile of her own as the two stood in silence for a few more seconds. Hange was growing more nervous with each passing second as a thought kept passing through her mind.

 _"Fuck it."_ Hange mutters.

"Excuse me?"

Hange blocked out all thoughts at that exact moment as she closed the distance between them and kissed her on the cheek lightly. Hange pulls back, her face still inches away from Isabel's, and smiles at the lady whose face showed surprise at her bold actions, "I just wanted to do that. slap me if you feel violated, I deserve it."

Isabel stood in shock for a millisecond before regaining her composure, "It's alright."

"Well then I regretfully must leave now, Miss Isabel. It truly was a pleasure to have danced under the moonlight with you." With a squeeze of her hand, Hange lets go and retreats to where their carriage was currently waiting for her. Hange jumps into the carriage and immediately plops down, her head resting on Levi's lap. "Oi!" Levi says, trying to pull her off of him.

"I kissed her." Hange announces. Levi stops his actions for a second, shocked at the revelation before he goes back to his agenda of pulling Hange off him.

"That was quite brave of you, Hange." Erwin offers.

"Yeah, I know... maybe you should tell me to garner attention next time, maybe then I'd have a better chance of staying hidden." Hange whispers, ignoring Levi's hands that continued to push her away.

Isabel stood exactly where she did, Astoria & Eleanor catching up to call her for the night.

"How'd it go?" Astoria asks, holding Isabel's hand.

Isabel raises her free hand to touch her cheek, "He kissed me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I said this was gonna be a slowburn fic and I swear it really is! In my mind with how I planned it out at least, I just couldn't resist and had to write some cute moments from the ball.
> 
> This is the final chapter for the ball so safe to say the next chapters will have a different setting and exciting conversations!


	6. Chapter 6

"Lewis Button or Kucci?" Isabel asks as she enters her sister's room. Astoria looks quizzically at her, unsure of what her question meant. "What kind of accessory will you be for Kasius tonight?"

Astoria rolls her eyes at her sister's lack of taste in jokes and throws a pillow at her, "Haha. very funny, sister."

"I can't believe you put up with these parties, Astoria. I mean sure the food's great and making fun of people is a great way to pass the time but _being by Kasius' side throughout the whole duration?_ " Isabel visibly shivers at the thought, "You should get paid for babysitting that man, preferably by the hour rate."

"He's not that bad once you get to know him, y'know?" Astoria defends though deep inside, she knew that her sister had a point.

Kasius wasn't awful nor intolerable, he was simply an airhead at times, making conversations with him feel a whole lot like talking to a child. Despite his shortcomings, Astoria enjoyed his company better than most men because he didn't explicitly treat her like an object to be set aside when he feels like it, if anything, Kasius looked at her like a lost puppy, waiting to fulfill whatever Astoria desired.

"Perhaps you'd like to come with me so I wouldn't have to suffer through a whole night with Kasius?" Astoria enticed. Having Isabel with her would surely be fun and without a doubt make the night much more bearable.

"Nope," Isabel instantly replies, popping the p. "I swore off men and going to that forsaken party is a clear breach of my vow."

"And what if a certain commander were to be in attendance?"

Isabel glanced knowingly at her sister. _hook, line, and sinker._

"Will... he be there?" she asks cautiously.

Astoria smiles, getting the reaction she wanted out of her. "Unfortunately not. I was talking about it in a hypothetical context."

Isabel groans, realizing she had fallen into one of her sister's traps.

It had been weeks since their family's ball and she had avoided all conversation regarding the commander. She claims it was a fluke and that she was simply playing the part for their mother's sake, it obviously didn't fool neither of her sisters.

Despite her own denials, Isabel constantly thought of that night and what had transpired. She'd be riding her horse in an attempt to distract herself even for a few minutes and yet she would find herself imagining what it would be like if the man were to accompany her on one of her rides. More often than not, she found it hard to sleep at night as the moon shined brightly and she was left to remember of their dance on the terrace with no care for the world that continued to run around them; the way he looked at her, the way his hands felt hot pressed against her back and her hand, the way he swept her off her feet both figuratively and literally.

Despite what she claimed, Isabel couldn't keep the commander off her mind like he had enchanted her with some spell that caused her to act the way she did. Not to mention that damned kiss, it was soft and she could still remember the way his hot breath ghosted on her cheek even as he pulled away a bit, their faces inches away from each other as he spoke to her in such a gentle tone.

"A penny for your thoughts, my dear sister?" Astoria says pulling her back to reality.

With a little shake of her head, Isabel blocks thoughts of the commander and turns her head to her sister, "It's nothing."

"You were thinking about him." She says matter of factly.

Isabel sighs knowing there was no way she could reason her way out of this, "It's like he's cast a spell on me. Even when I will myself to not think of him, of that night, of that kiss... It is all I seem to think about day in and out. _He is my only thought, my only daydream._ though it's beginning to feel a lot like a curse with how much he fills my head."

Isabel lets out a huff as Astoria giggles approaching and sitting beside her, she puts her hands on her sister's cheeks to give it a light squish, "One would think you're infatuated with the way you talk about him."

"I am not infatuated with him!" Isabel defends, acting so scandalized.

Astoria raises an eyebrow at her sister's defensiveness, "and what defense will you bring up now, Isabel?"

"You... I can't possibly be infatuated with someone from one meeting. It's ridiculous and even if it were possible, It makes me look like someone who would easily fall for a man with just one look. It's not a good look and not one I want for myself."

Astoria hums in understanding before tenderly offering her own take, "I suppose you do have a point,"

"Exactl-"

Astoria cuts her off, not giving her the satisfaction of pushing the possibility away just yet, "But you know how fairytales and love stories still like to believe in love at first sight?"

Isabel's eyes widen at what she believed her sister was insinuating, "I am not a hopeless romantic, Astoria."

She giggles, "I never said you were, my dear." she brushes her sister's hair and tucks it behind her ear, "Our stories have made us believe in love at a first sight, _no matter how foolish you think it sounds._ Reality doesn't always mirror the stories we've made up has it? that doesn't mean that it cannot manifests to some extent - My point is... a few people are fortunate enough to meet someone and form an instant connection; like you've known them your whole life and feel at ease in their presence, they are the kind of people who bring out the person you've hidden deep within, with them you don't feel the need to pretend to be someone else. _You are unapologetically you_ and it feels like a breathe of fresh air."

Isabel is rendered speechless because while parts of it didn't seem true, there were points that undeniably held weight and which she knew to be true. With Commander Zoë, none of her smiles were forced, the tension that had always found its place in her shoulders around men disappeared. For once, she felt like she had come up for fresh air. Though their night started with hostility and annoyance on Isabel's side, she can't deny that as the night progressed, her past inhibitions had dissipated and she found herself enjoying his company - enough so that she felt bold enough to ask him to dance with her and that in itself was a privilege for not many had received the luxury of dancing with one Isabel Black.

"As much as I would like to continue our conversation and your little crush on the commander, I expect that Kasius will be here in a few minutes." Astoria announces, bouncing off the bed and grabbing her purse and shoal. She trudges towards the door to exit but not before Isabel speaks again, "Thank you, Astoria."

Astoria turns to face her sister with an affectionate smile on her features, "You should write to him."

"I- I didn't even get his first name..." Isabel answers shamefully.

Astoria walks back to her sister, putting a finger under her chin to lift her head to face her, "You're a smart girl, Isabel. I know you can think off a way. Besides, didn't we establish that he works with Commander Erwin in the scouts regiment?" Astoria offers and with that, she left Isabel to take in the information.

Isabel retreats to her own room for the night and lazily plops down on her bed.

She lies there for a few minutes, weighing out whether it'd be a good idea to write to him; He didn't ask her to write to him and perhaps he thought of her as simply a one night thing. So many thoughts fill Isabel's mind which tires her out within a few more minutes.

Isabel huffs, pushing herself up to sit down. Not wanting to further aggravate herself, she decides on the spot so as to not give herself further opportunies to think of consequences or outcomes, "I'm writing that letter." She announces to no one in particular.

She moves to her table which has an abundance of books, paper, and pens placed neatly on it. She grabs one of her fancier papers that has been induced with the scent of coffee, along with her favorite writing pen with the goal of writing a letter to one Commander Zoë of the Scouts Regiment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm quite pleased with how this turned out. I had my doubts that I wouldn't be able to write a good conversation between the two - by the way, did y'all notice the poor word plays? ;)
> 
> As always, your thoughts are most welcomed so comment away! I love reading your comments, it motivates me to make better chapters knowing that there are people who will appreciate it.


	7. Chapter 7

"Lady Isabel! perhaps you'd like to buy more scented papers?" the old man who owns the stationary shop Isabel has frequented endorses. Isabel politely smiles and shakes her head, "It's quite alright. I still have an abundance left."

"Hmm? It's been quite a while since you've last bought. Have you not been writing any letters as of late?" He asks. Isabel winces from his direct question though she knew that he meant nothing malicious. Isabel enjoyed writing mundane letters to the few people in their circle that she considered friends however as of lately, she's been having a hard time writing such, the uneventful nights she's spent writing letter after letter for the commander suddenly entering her mind.

"Oh believe me, Jonas. Isabel has been writing plenty lately." Astoria interjects, grabbing her sister by the shoulder while holding her other sister by the hand.

Truth be told she had written plenty, her final piece left of the coffee-scented paper tucked into her purse, yet despite her current supply - or the lack thereof - she had no intentions of buying for one simple reason; it'd simply be wasted. She gathered that if she didn't have extra supplies then maybe she'd come up with a letter that she didn't entirely dislike and so she treats her final piece of paper like a rarity, if not then she would have no choice but to accept whatever she's written on it.

"I'll surely buy some the next time we come to town, Jonas." Isabel informs with a smile. The man doesn't question further and wishes them a good day to which the sisters all politely reply the same.

The trio continue their trip into town, several shop owners they've become acquainted with greeting and offering them small pieces of whatever they were selling to which the trio would politely decline. Growing up in a fine lifestyle, Alistair Black always made sure to remind his daughters of the luxury of a life they lived and how different it could be for other people. They were taught not to take more than what they needed and to never abuse other people's kindness; if they could pay for it, they should. If they don't need it then it is better to decline than to accept out of decency. Their father made sure that his daughters grew up never having to worry about money but he also taught them its importance and so much more than that. He gave them the most beautiful life one could dream in the world they lived in and he taught them to appreciate it for what it was.

Today, they went to town with the agenda to buy a few day dresses or whatever clothes they pleased to wear in their idle time. Isabel had spent lots of time as of recently, riding her horse and walking across the vast area of land they owned and because of this most of her day dresses had began to tear in several places which was enough to give Lady Black a headache. Alistair encouraged them to take this trip as it's been a long time since they've gone out and he didn't want them to feel like they were being cooped up inside their mansion forcefully. Astoria and Eleanor had no complaints as going to town had always been a welcome activity, getting to interact with other people outside of their circle and speak of mundane stuff. Admittedly, they easily grew sick of conversations with people from their circle as it always revolved around flaunting their wealth or the activities they did while many people continued to struggle what with the shortage in food and supplies that each district experienced. With the people, they were able to get a view of the situation and think of ways to help them through their struggle.

Isabel enjoyed going to town just like her sisters - always elated to be out of their family's grounds, but today she had a different reason for being excited to be in town.

"Calm yourself, my dear. The commander has yet to show himself in our presence today." Astoria teases, noticing her sister's frantic eyes.

Isabel cheekily grins at Astoria and tries to regain her composure though her eyes gave her away, she could pretend all she wants that she was calm but the way her eyes scanned the area said it all.

"Which commander are we talking about, Astoria?" Eleanor teases, still not letting the joking rivalry between the two commanders die down. Isabel rolls her eyes and lightly slaps her sister's arm.

"Tsk tsk. No horse play, Isabel." Astoria tuts.

"You should tell that to Kasius." Isabel can't help but let slip out. Astoria gasps and turns to her in betrayal, "Really, Isabel?" She says feigning annoyance.

Eleanor and Isabel laugh at her reaction as Isabel puts up her hands in surrender, "Alright alright, I'll stop it."

The three enter their favorite shop and begin to check out the displays for dresses and clothes that are to their liking. They separate and agree to find each other once they've found pieces of clothing they want to try on, Isabel going to the right side of the shop. She lightly brushes her hand across the hangers, making the material sway. She chose this side of the shop as it was where the polo and dress shirts were located. She realized from her horse rides lately how impractical it was to wear a dress and decided that wearing pants and a shirt seemed to be a much better option, she scanned through the racks, picking out pieces that caught her eye. A faded yellow dress shirt caught her eye and just as she was about to reach for it, another hand came into view clearly reaching for the same piece, she looked up to whoever was about to pick it up and was surprised to see the light brown eyes that she had been thinking off for so many nights, "It’s you." she mutters surprised.

Hange's eyes widen upon recognizing her face, "Lady Isabel!" she squeaks out.

"Section Commander! are you alright?!" a panicky man asks running to Hange's side. She waves him off, "I'm fine, Moblit. No need to be so panicky." She chuckles.

"Lady Isabel, this is Moblit Berner. He's my assistant and squad member." Hange introduces. Moblit automatically salutes to her which Isabel kindly smiles at in reply.

Her eyes turn back towards Hange, "what are you doing here?"

"Oh! Uhm," Hange starts out. How was she to explain why was she in a shop that sold female clothing? "As embarrassing as it may sound... I'm quite a scrawny fellow. so... you could say that female clothing fits me better?" she explains, her cheeks gaining heat with each word. Moblit truly wanted to help save the section commander from the line of questioning however his mind decided to blank out at that exact moment.

Isabel didn't seem too fazed with Hange's answer as she remembers how thin Hange's figure was when she wrapped her hand around his wrist. She took the answer for what it was and didn't question it further. Had it her way, she would've probably gone to a men's shop and gotten shirts that were sizes too big on her, it would've been more comfortable than the sizings in this shop.

"Hmm then I guess I'll have to relent this one to you." Isabel replies, handing the hanger that held the yellow dress shirt to Hange.

"It's fine, Miss. If you wish to get it then I have no qualms, there are plenty dress shirts in here that'll surely suffice."

Isabel tuts, shoving the hanger in her hand and begins to push her towards the dressing rooms. Her sister's are already there waiting for her and a glint of surprise pass their eyes upon seeing the commander. "Commander Zoë," Astoria greets with a smile, her eyes flickering to her sister's for a second. Isabel eyes her warningly to not mention their previous conversation and Astoria relents. "What a surprise it is to see you _here_ of all places."

Hange rubs the back of her neck, "I hope you don't think of me as a pervert or anything of the sort, Lady Astoria. The sizing here simply fits me better."

Astoria doesn't reply and simply nods before dragging Eleanor to the dressing rooms to try on their own dresses.

"Come on then." Isabel nudges Hange towards the dressing rooms at the opposite end from where Astoria and Eleanor were currently at.

"I'll wait out here." she announces, receiving a confused look from Hange.

Isabel rolls her eyes, "If it doesn't look good on you, I will have no choice but to steal it away from you."

Hange nods and closes the curtain to dressing room. She prays that the curtain was thick enough that Isabel would not see her. It's not that she was worried about being seen stripping, she had done it countless times in the headquarters around people who knew her little secret - Moblit included. But she was worried that Isabel would see the bandages wrapped carefully around her chest, no matter how much she tried to tightly wrap it, it still had the faintest of bumps but even then it was too much to be mistaken for a man's body - not to mention how despite the muscles she's developed from training in the military for so long, there was no hiding that she still had a woman's body covered in healed scars and light bruises.

She quickly put on the yellow dress shirt and left the top button unbuttoned. Giving herself one last look in the mirror, she lets out a huff and draws the curtain open, immediately welcomed by the sight of Isabel who had been standing patiently outside. Hange's chest immediately radiates that same warmth she felt the first night they met and she fights off the smile that is threatening to show. Isabel's eyes look her up and down, twinkling with what Hange could only assume was please.

"It looks good on you." Isabel compliments. Hange could feel her cheeks heat up from the simple compliment and rubs the back of her neck, "So am I not in danger of you stealing this from me?"

Isabel giggles before giving her a nod. Hange turns back inside and begins to dress back into her own clothing, neatly folding the yellow dress shirt that she was about to buy. Upon exiting the stall, Isabel was nowhere to be found and a disappointed smile graced her lips. _Guess that's the last of my meeting with her._

Hange admittedly wanted to spend even just a few more minutes with the lady but immediately shook the thought away, she took what she was given and that was enough.

"Commander Zoë!" A voice shouts, making her look up to the direction the voice came from. She walks cautiously towards it and sees Isabel inside one of the stalls, dawning a white polo shirt with a smile on her face.

"How do I look?"

"Magical." Hange replies without much thought.

Isabel giggles hearing her reply, "You flatter me too much, Commander."

Hange shakes her head with a smile, "I'm simply stating the truth, Miss Isabel. _You are enchanting to look at..._ "

Isabel turns away, feeling the heat rise to her cheeks. Hange mentally slaps herself for sounding so cringey at that moment but decides to play it off. "Well, I'm afraid I must go pay and leave now. I have a couple other errands to run." Hange announces, masking the disappointment of their soon separation.

As Hange turns away to exit, Isabel is reminded of why she was hoping to see the commander today in the first place and reaches for her pouch in search of the coffee-scented paper she had put in last minute. She runs after the commander who was just about to exit the shop, "Commander!" she screams. Hange abruptly stops as does Moblit, Isabel stands in front of her and extends her hand that held the delicate piece of paper, "I look forward to your letter, Commander." She announces, pushing the letter into Hange's and walks back to where her sisters were watching the scene unfold, both displaying wicked grins on their faces.

"Shall we go, Section Commander?" Moblit interrupts. Hange tucks the paper gingerly into the inside pocket of her coat as they set off to do the rest of their errands.

\-------------------------

A year had passed since Hange last saw Isabel, not that she mentally noted the date but her birthday had just passed a few weeks ago and that time last year, Erwin had deliberately used it as a reason to get her to attend to the ball hosted by the Black family. Safe to say it was her favorite birthday to date as she got to dance under the stars with a beautiful lady no matter how cheesy that sounded.

An eventful year had passed with expeditions, death, planning, and progress. Hange had taken the initiative of learning more about the Titans, constantly pestering Erwin to catch a titan for further testing - it took several months of persuasion before Erwin finally relented, just wanting the brown haired section commander to stop cornering him at every given moment. Hange greatly appreciated his generosity and was fuelled by an entirely new determination to show him results as a sign of her gratitude, she had busied herself with studying titans at all opportunities but never neglecting her other duties such as making sure her soldiers were trained and well prepared should they need to go on an abrupt mission, as well as making sure she was caught up with her massive load of paperwork - some of which Moblit had voluntarily written in her stead on the condition that she get even a few hours of rest.

Hange had grown demanding of herself. Where she would be lenient to her soldiers who were just about ready to pass out from the strenuous training and scorching heat, she was strict and almost merciless on herself. It had become a point of worry for her own soldiers, enough so that Moblit had brought it up to Levi who could possibly talk - _or in Levi's belief, punch _\- some sense into the section commander.__

__Though Hange would like to deceive herself into thinking that she was doing all this because she didn't want to disappoint Erwin or break his trust in her, Hange knew in the back of her mind that she was using the welcomed heavy workload to keep her mind off things - or to be specific, someone._ _

__Hange places her pen on her table, eyeing the paper that stood out in her bunches of paperwork. It had been a year and she had yet to send or write a letter. At first, she simply didn't have the time as she was continuously pursuing Erwin to talk about capturing a titan but with time she just found it near impossible to begin. What was she supposed to write about? There was nothing exactly exciting about her life besides the military stuff and though most of it wasn't explicitly confidential, she wasn't sure that was the kind of letter Isabel would want to receive. For all she knew, Isabel Black was a daughter raised in luxury and fine dresses, she surely didn't take interest in the same things that Hange did and thus she feared writing the letter, making up all kinds of excuses not to write it._ _

__She had finished most of the paperwork she needed to submit for the week and quite honestly no matter how much a welcomed distraction it was, Hange didn't think she had it in her to write any more than she already had. The logical side of her knew that this was a good opportunity to get some rest but Moblit had left her to sleep in during the afternoon nap he had forced upon her, thus her energy was still quite plenty. She looked towards the sky, taking in the sight of the moon. The full moon was out for display tonight, enticing her to perhaps go the terrace of the castle to enjoy the view, _except Hange knew where the view was best to appreciate.__ _

__She pushed her chair back and stood up, adjusting the harnesses she didn't bother to remove, she eyed the ODM gear that she had placed on her coffee table and decided it was better to have it on just in case. Just as she was walking across the grounds, she passes by a shorter man halfway who's already glaring in her direction, "Where are you going?" Levi asks._ _

__"Stables. gonna take Nova out for a ride." Hange answers casually, receiving a nod from Levi. "Don't stay out too long."_ _

__"Sure thing, Grumpy." She teases as she passes by him._ _

__Once reaching the stables, she goes to her horse right away, "Hey buddy. missed you." she greets, brushing his brown hair. She offers him an apple she brought along getting a merry sound from the horse. "You mind going on a trip with me?" She asks as she props herself up on the horse._ _

__She carefully guides him out of the stables before clicking her tongue and making Nova speed up towards her destination. It only takes a little over 20 minutes for her to reach her destination. A view of tall trees welcome her as she gets down from Nova and ties him to one of the sturdy trees._ _

__"It's been a while." She says while letting out a breath, taking in the view in front of her. She walks into the forest by foot, following the trail she had grown so familiar with from visiting the location time and time again. Just as she swat a thin branch away, she heard a yelp from the other side causing Hange to jump back and instinctively draw her blade. "Who's there?!" She yells._ _

__The voice doesn't respond for a few seconds before a head peeps out from where she had swatted the branch, "Hange?" The voice timidly says._ _

__She immediately recognizes who it is, "Lady Isabel..." she mutters in surprise._ _

__Isabel walks into her view, "What are you doing here?"_ _

__"T-the moon was out for display tonight. I wanted to get the best view of it."_ _

__Isabel looks at her puzzled, "The best view of the moon... is in the forest where it's deliberately blocked by trees?"_ _

__Hange laughs, realizing how the situation seemed and shakes her head, "Not here. Come, I'll show you." She invites, extending her arm out to Isabel._ _

__Isabel easily holds her hand and is immediately dragged through the trail as Hange trudges towards where she claims has the best view. "We're here." she announces._ _

__She holds back a bunch of branches and Isabel all but gasps at the view in front of her, it was at the edge of land where the river flowed freely below, the moon making the ripples glisten._ _

__"Hange... this is beautiful."_ _

__Hange smiles to herself pleased, "Told you."_ _

__Hange sits down by the edge, holding out a hand to Isabel who stood in place still in awe of the sight. She takes her hand and sits beside the section commander as they were both surrounded by silence; the breeze making the branches bustle, the ripple waves of the river, and their breathing the only sounds that could be heard. They spent what felt like hours just taking in the view before them before Isabel was reminded of who she was with tonight, "You haven't written back to me."_ _

__Hange chokes on her saliva at the sudden accusation and pounds on her chest, "Yeah... My apologies, Missus. Military work has left me no time to write anything decent back." She reasons out. Isabel took it for what it was and didn't press further, "I meant it when I said I'll patiently wait for you to write back so... no pressure."_ _

__Hange smiles appreciatively and turns back to the moon. "What brought you here tonight, Miss?"_ _

Isabel thoughtfully considers telling the truth and decides there's no harm in saying it anyway, "You." She says with a turn of her face to look at him.

Hange's eyes widen, "Me?"

"Yeah," Isabel smiles at his reaction, pulling her knees close to her chest. "Did you know the moon shined this bright the night of the ball too? Whenever the full moon came out, it would make me think of that night. I've relived the memory in my mind time and time again. I couldn't stop thinking about it so I decided to take Marquis out for a ride, just to shake the thoughts away even just for a while." She confesses, burying her face a bit, feeling her cheeks heating up.

"I've been meaning to write to you." Hange confesses.

"Then why haven't you?"

Hange shrugs her shoulders trying to appear unfazed despite her heartbeat quickening, "Honestly? I had no idea what to write. Nothing exciting ever happens in my life besides the military stuff, I didn't think you'd want to hear about it."

"Are you kidding me?!" Isabel all but screams turning her body to face Hange, placing both her hands on the ground to support herself from the burst of laughter that escaped herself, calming herself down a bit she looks at the warm brown orbs that stared at her in confusion, "Commander Zoë-"

"Hange." She announces.

 _"Hange..."_ Isabel test the name, liking the way it rolls off her tongue. "Hange, I wrote about wasting so much paper that even if I didn't like how that final one turned out I would have no choice since I'm all out of paper... and you think that your military life - as mundane as you may think it to be - would bore me?"

Isabel sends a reassuring smile Hange's way, "Mundane or not, I want to know all about it. I want to know about your day or your week or your month - whatever you can give, I'll gladly take it. I want to be in on what happens in your life. That's it."

As if it were possible, Hange's heartbeat increasingly quickens with her words. This woman she had met one night by chance wanted to know about her. It made the butterflies that Hange had tamed in the pit of her stomach flutter even just a bit, her cheeks turning as red as a tomato as it was illuminated by the moonlight. She coughs turning her head to the side, avoiding the lady's intense stare. "Well then, how about I make it up to you?"

"And how will you do that?" Isabel questions, raising an eyebrow.

A playful grin spreads on Hange's lips as she stands up and offers a hand to Isabel who immediately takes it. "Do you trust me?"

Isabel raises an eyebrow, "I barely know you."

"I need an answer, princess." Hange encourages. The term is not lost on Isabel but she decides to ignore it and lets out a huff, "Fine. Yes I trust you, Hange."

Hange's grin widens, "Hang on tight." she informs, looping an arm tightly around Isabel's waist as she clicks her gear, taking them both off the ground and into the air, safely avoiding the branches. Isabel yelps at the sudden turn of events and closes her eyes, burying her head into Hange's neck, "Don't look away now, princess." Hange whispers, encouraging Isabel to open her eyes and the moment she does, she is in awe of the sight presented to her. The moon never lost from their view as they flew past trees, Hange expertly manoeuvring while making sure to keep a secure hand on Isabel's waist, in the moment they had taken off the ground Isabel had instinctively looped her arms around Hange's neck.

"Does this suffice as an apology, My Light?" Hange asks, eyes never leaving the path they were flying through.

Isabel can't help the way she feels the tug on her heartstrings, taking in the concentrated face of the man who had been enchanting her once mundane life since entering her life. She smiles affectionately and nuzzles her face into Hange's neck once more and whispers, "Perfectly." Her breath tickles Hange's neck, causing goosebumps across her entire body.

Though Hange wasn't sure if it was solely from that or the intimacy that this moment gave. It didn't matter either way, she was just glad to spend this moment of serenity with _her light._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wondering, is there a specific female 104th trainee squad member any of you want to see? ;)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be in the previous chapter but I had a bit of a writer's block which manifested a lot in this chapter. Read the note at the end too since I do want to hear your answers!

"Hold on tight." Hange's voice reaches Isabel's ear as she lands them both on a sturdy branch, Isabel immediately losing her footing and almost falling if not for Hange's hand that immediately grabbed onto her. Hange tuts at Isabel, "I told you to hold on tight, princess." she teases.

Isabel's face goes a deeper shade of red from embarrassment and rolls her eyes playfully at her, "Thanks for not letting me fall."

"I'll always be here to catch you." Hange replies, the malicious implication in her words not lost on Isabel.

Isabel brushes his words off and sits down on the branch, her legs dangling off as she continues to take in the magical view in front of her.

"How'd you discover this place?" she asks the man who had just sat beside her, their fingers faintly touching.

"I like to go out for a ride when I want to distract myself from all the thoughts lurking in my mind."

She looks at him amused, "You and I have that in common. perhaps we're more alike than you think, now I'm certain your letter won't bore me as much as you think."

Hange's eyes widen in embarrassment at her particular line of attack but offers an apologetic smile in return, "I'll get started on that letter as soon as I return to HQ." she promises.

"I told you, I'll patiently wait - no matter how long that may be."

Hange shakes her head and jumps up to her feet, surprising Isabel in the process. She takes her stance; fist colliding with her chest, the other behind her back - the salute that has become second nature to her from years of working in the survey corps. Isabel giggles at her antics, "What is that supposed to mean?" She asks, putting her palm flat on her chest where her heart is while bowing her head in response.

"Our salute means to dedicate our hearts, that's why it goes where our hearts are." Hange flatly states like that was enough of an explanation however, her answer did not alleviate Isabel's confusion in the slightest, "And...?" Isabel urges for her to explain further.

"Ah! My apologies, I do have a peculiar way of thinking which not even my comrades can follow easily, I should've expected you'd be less inclined considering you're not even in the regiment." she goes on a rant, her words overlapping as she sped up her talking pace.

Hange inhales deeply to calm her nerves before deciding to explain further, "When we dedicate our hearts to humanity it usually goes along the lines of fighting for it until our dying breath. But in this case, I only wish to let the lady know that I take this matter very seriously and will treat it as such - like a duty given to me as a soldier. I will dedicate my heart to the Lady Isabel-"

And there it is, that familiar tug in Isabel's chest. The one she's only ever felt because of the man in front of her, declaring to dedicate his heart to her without much consideration on what the words could mean. Isabel has never in any way fawned or shown interest in a man other than what is expected of her yet she knew in the way her cheeks heat up, her thoughts immediately reliving that night, the way she felt her heartbeat quicken with his actions and words - it was evident that while she was not hopelessly in love with this man, he had inevitably etched his existence in her life. Only his words had this kind of effect on her, only his eyes could keep her in a trance as they searched her soul the same way she did his. Isabel Black was enchanted with section commander Hange Zoë, that was the only truth she knew to be true in that moment.

"Miss Isabel?" Hange calls out after a while wherein the lady had not responded in the slightest to her words, a look of worry crossing her features.

At the call of her name, Isabel shakes her head free of other thoughts and focuses her attention on him again, "I'm sorry, I got lost in my thoughts. What were you saying?"

Hange smiles amused, "I said that I will dedicate my heart to Lady Isabel as she has kindly given me time to procure a heartfelt letter that will include what happens in my life. I dare not abuse that kindness and swear to have a letter ready within 3 days time."

Isabel can't help but let her fondness for the man take over as she reaches out for his hand, quietly grasping it in hers, "I look forward to reading it."

Hange stares at their intertwined hands, her thoughts unknown to Isabel, "I regret that I must leave soon else I aggravate a certain captain." Hange announces, thinking of Levi's taunt to not stay out too late.

Isabel's features visibly show her sadness at their time together ending so abruptly but she immediately masks her emotions and offers the section commander a comforting smile, "I understand. I'm glad to have spent this evening with you, Commander."

 _"It's actually section commander..."_ Hange mutters embarrassed.

Isabel leans in with quizzical eyes, "Do you mind repeating that? I apologize, I did not hear it well."

Hange turns back to meet her eyes, highly aware of how close their faces were to each other, "It's section commander. I am not of the commander status, I felt it best to correct as it's disrespectful to the Commander to have someone view me of the same rank as him."

Isabel nods, understanding her sentiment though also realizing the way he regarded himself. It made her heart ache to think that the person in front of her didn't think he was a capable soldier, enough to be a commander in the future. Isabel didn't know much about the military as they didn't have much books regarding the topic, but she knew that being a section commander was an honour and that to be one meant that a soldier has proven his skills, strength, and wit. All of which Isabel has seen in the man in front of her.

Isabel reaches a hand out to hold the section commander's face, her thumb comfortingly brushing his cheek. "You could be... one day." she says with confidence.

Hange turns her face to the ground with a shake of her head, Isabel's hand still gently holding it. Without much thought, Isabel leans in and places a chaste kiss on his cheek - the same way he had done to her on the night of the dance. "I believe you can be. That's my truth." She says, hoping that all her affection and belief in the section commander was effectively conveyed in her words. He looks up to her, searching her face for any signs of teasing or lies but he sees none. Hange holds her hand, "Thank you... for believing in me." She whispers.

"I always will." Isabel reaffirms.

The walk back to their horses is spent in silence, Isabel's eyes still glued to the moon shining above them while Hange's glanced towards her every other second. Upon reaching their horses, Isabel easily hoists herself up on Marquis, gaining an impressed look from Hange, "You weren't kidding when you said you ride often." He remarks.

Isabel's mouth forms an O shape as her eyebrows furrow, "Did you think I was lying about that?"

Hange shrugs, "Who knows? You could've just said it to impress me. After all, getting on a horse is one thing, riding is another."

"Is that so, section commander? Then can I interest you in a brief gallop towards the district?"

Hange shakes her head and Isabel immediately feels disappointment from the rejection, "It's too late out for that. Although I would have no complaints on a ride to accompany you back to your home."

"Section Commander, you need not do anything of the sorts!" Isabel replies surprised at the offer.

"I insist. It will give me much needed peace to know my light reached her home safely."

Isabel knew deep down that she wanted to spend more time with the man and the opportunity had presented itself, who was she to refuse? "Don't fall too much for my skills, section commander."

Hange lets out a loud laugh, bending over to catch her breath, "It'll take a lot to impress me, Lady Isabel."

The ride back to the Black Mansion lasted a good hour and would've surely been cut in half if the pair weren't busy fooling around. Isabel at times could hear Astoria yell out to them to stop their horseplay and she'd immediately double over laughing at the mere thought of it. 

As they reached the Black Mansion, opting to go through the back door as Isabel was going to sneak back into her room. They both got off their horses, Hange steadily holding Nova's reigns to make sure he didn't run away. They stared at each other pensively, neither clearly not wanting their night to end just yet, but Hange knew that going back to HQ was going to take a while and she really didn't want to deal with a pissed off shorty tonight. She heaves out a sigh, looking apologetically towards the lady, "I'm afraid I must leave now."

"Thank you for accompanying me back home, Section Commander. Though you really didn't have to."

"If it meant spending a few more moments watching the lady almost topple over on her horse, it was all worth it in the end." Hange cheekily grins.

Isabel merely rolls her eyes and waves him off. "Well then," Hange proceeds to bow as he did during that night, "Goodnight, My Light."

Isabel giggles at his antics and curtsies in return, "Goodnight, Section Commander. I wish you a safe trip back."

With a flash of a smile, Hange jumps back on Nova and guides the horse back to HQ in full speed.

Isabel watches as his figure fades from her sight and with a sigh enters through the back door, making sure to be extra careful so as not to make even minimal noise. She successfully gets back to the hallway leading up to her room, the events of tonight replaying in her head. It used to be a mere thought, a mere daydream she imagined of galloping through the meadows or the field with the section commander but tonight that daydream had become a reality and she was not in any way disappointed.

It was easy with the section commander, Isabel didn't feel the need to be elegant or ladylike as her mother had demanded time and time again. Hange didn't flinch or show visible disgust when she laughed merrily - a couple of snorts escaping in the process, He didn't even mind to begin with that she rode a horse and was much more amused by the fact. Isabel already knew that he was different from the men she'd grown up with and yet she still found herself surprised and infatuated over the bare minimum of behaviors. Hange treated her like a normal person which is more than can be said for the other men she's met.

"Had a nice ride I assume?" Astoria's voice suddenly pops out, Isabel jumps a bit in surprise before turning to her sister who was leaning against her door frame, arms crossed around her chest while her eyes gleamed with amusement.

"It was a dream come true." Isabel replies, not entirely relaying the events of tonight.

Before her sister could even further interrogate her, Isabel had swiftly escaped to the confines of her room, plopping down on her bed and once again reliving the moments with the section commander in her head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! Sorry it took a while to publish this short chapter, writer's block was harsh on me these past few days. Anyway, I just wanted to know which of the female 104th training squad members would you possibly want to see in future chapters? :)


	9. Chapter 9

Hange had successfully avoided Levi upon arrival back at headquarters, dashing straight to her room.

She felt the drowsiness enticing her to sleep but she pushed it to the back of her head as she sat at her chair, picking up the paper that stood out from her stacks of paperwork with the goal of starting on her letter to one Lady Isabel Black. She had written a few lines when a knock on her door distracted her, "Name and state your business." She calls out to whoever was behind the door, tucking the letter inside the first drawer of her desk.

"It's Erwin." comes the reply.

"Come in!" Hange replies in panic, hurrying to stand before the commander who had just entered her office, immediately sending a salute his way which he acknowledges.

"I came by a few hours ago though it seems you weren't here at the time. I heard gallops not too long ago and had to visit as soon as possible." He informs, Hange flinches at his words. Thankfully she currently had her back to him so he didn't see the way her face cringed at getting caught.

"To what do I owe you this visit?" she asks.

She easily notices the spark flash through Erwin's eyes, she'd worked with him long enough to know his tells. "You have another gamble in mind." She states, waiting for his confirmation.

Erwin nods, his stoic cerulean orbs stoic staring back into her warm brown ones. "It's nothing risky in the slightest." he assures though Hange didn't believe him in the slightest.

"There's always a risk to it, Erwin. otherwise we wouldn't be calling it a gamble." She curtly replies, gaining a fond smile from the commander.

Hange directs them both towards the couch situated next to the window in her office. As soon as Hange sits down, her face loses all signs of her playful aura as she switches to the serious section commander. "I know this is abrupt but time is of the essence." He informs. She nods bitterly, with their current fight it seems that time was never a luxury they could afford.

"We've gained intel that the thieves who took valuable gears from the Garrison-" _Ah... the assholes who stole ODM gear and have been using it for their selfish reasons._

"They've been spotted two districts away yesterday. If there is a pattern - which I do hope there is - we're assuming that they'll be staying in the district for a few more days considering the last time they stole ODM gear has been a while back and the nearest stationed Garrison is within that district." He offers intel which Hange had more or less already known if his first set of info was anything to go by.

"So you want my squad to interfere before they can get their hands on more supplies." She confirms to which Erwin nods.

In plain sight, his plan of action was something Hange had expected from the ambitious man who she had inferred to have a subtle sadistic streak - his gambles bordering deadly at some points. but there were parts of this particular mission that Hange couldn't comprehend how it would be beneficial to them, "Wouldn't the MPs be going after them as well though? surely the fresh recruits would be ordered to detain them?"

Erwin stares blankly at her, waiting for her to piece it all together but Hange only felt herself grow smaller under his gaze. When he realized that she wasn't going to conclude it by herself, he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his thighs, "If the MPs are lucky enough to catch these thugs who've dealt with the Garrison enough to render them helpless-" his insinuations of the MPs useless nature well conveyed and understood by Hange. "what do you think would the MPs do with them?"

"I assume they'll be detained for a few years." She replies the obvious answer.

"That's a waste of their skills, don't you think?" Hange's eyes go wide with realization at what Erwin's gamble was.

"Erwin, you're not telling me-" He raises an eyebrow at her.

"You want to recruit them?"

"Would it be so wrong?"

"They're thieves!"

"Thieves who are skilled in ODM gear and have slipped from the Garrison's grasps more than once. _I believe you of all people would know not to judge a book by its cover._ "

Hange gasps at his words, not believing that he would use it against her at this moment, "The circumstances are a bit different, don't you think?" She offers.

Erwin simply shrugs at her, "I did say this is a gamble. We're betting on the chance that we catch them before the MP does and avoid aggressive negotiations with these people."

Hange heaves out a sigh, the conversation making her grow more tired with each passing second. She nods in resignation, trusting his judgement. Erwin may have a sadistic streak and an unhealthy addiction for betting their reputation and lives more often than what could be deemed as necessary, but Hange has always trusted when he believed a gamble to be worth the risk, because Erwin was a capable commander and a trusted friend, who was she to deny him risks when it's all she's known since joining the regiment.

"Alright. I'll trust your judgement on this one, Erwin."

Erwin nods, pleased that his friend had easily agreed, "Levi's squad shall assist you on this mission. I have no doubt you two will be able to produce results."

They both stand up, Hange escorting him towards the door, He turns to her with a warm smile on his face, "Thank you, Hange."

Hange returns his smile, "It's a small effort to make compared to the sacrifices you've had to make."

He turns away from her but just as Hange was about to close the door, his voice calls out, "I suggest you get some sleep now. You only have a few hours left before you have to leave. Surely you wouldn't want Levi to realize how late you returned?"

Hange once again flinches from his words, "Alright Erwin." she replies, closing the door behind him.

Erwin was a good friend but that didn't change the fact that he was still making Hange cower under his commanding aura.

\------------------

"I want everyone to have their full attention on the lookout. We cannot afford to screw this up." Levi announces to the men riding on their horses with him.

A chorus of _yes captain!_ can be heard as Levi stands on his horse, preparing to leap off and switch to vertical manoeuvring. Hange takes note of his actions, turning her attention towards her own soldiers, "You heard shorty! Don't fail me and ride as fast as you can, don't rest until you capture the targets!" She shouts in the lowest tone she could muster. A flash of fuelled determination passes through each of her squad's eyes as she herself narrows her eyes as they enter the district where Erwin had instructed them to capture the group of delinquents.

Levi's squad had the responsibility of utilizing their ODM gear, scanning the streets from up above and well prepared to fight in the air should the targets decide to show their skills in vertical manoeuvring. Hange's squad was in charge of on-ground scouting, leaving no corner untouched as they spread throughout the entire district in search of people they didn't know the faces off.

Truth be told Levi found the mission to be ridiculous as their targets remained to be faceless. What was the point of capturing if they didn't even know what or who they were looking for? Despite how stupid the mission was to him, Levi had a vengeful tact for following through with Erwin's orders - even the ones he least agreed with.

It wasn't unreasonable of Erwin to put Levi and Hange in charge of today's mission as they were recognized as the commander's left and right hand; always discussing plans and arguing on the best courses of action. Levi had the skill, the strength, and while it was not to say that Hange lacked said factors, Hange was more recognized for her strategic contributions, her tactical plans. Erwin was a balance of the pair's combined fortes and that made the trio an esteemed threat. The Scouts Regiment had shown better results since the three had taken charge in their own specialties, enough so that their reputation, while it was not stellar was deemed to be admirable.

But today's mission wasn't just about utilizing Levi's strength nor Hange's smarts. Beyond the threat the trio imposed in their unified forces, was an unbreakable bond and trust - they knew each other's secrets, their lives, their personal hells.

It didn't take much for Hange to realize why it was of utmost cruciality that Levi and herself lead this mission; Levi had once lived in the literal shadows known as The Underground, his reputation as the top brass no secret to the men inside the regiment. And Hange who's masked her entire identity since joining the military, learning to blend in and adapt to her situation. If anyone could identify the faceless culprits, it would be them.

A few minutes had passed since they began travelling through the city, Levi had ordered his soldiers to save up their supplies and switch back to on-ground surveying. It didn't take long for Levi to rejoin Hange's side, nodding his head in greeting while his eyes were fixed on the pathway they were currently on. Each minute that passed was substantial time lost, the possibility of the thieves retreating to another district not too far fetched.

"They're still here." Levi announced like he had read her thoughts.

"What makes you think that?"

"Running away will cause more suspicion. They've been doing so well hiding in the shadows, why risk it?"

Hange nods her head in agreement and continues to trudge forwards.

A shout of Captain and Section Commander simultaneously comes from behind, causing Hange and Levi to turn to the voices.

"We've accounted 3! _so far._ " One of the soldiers announces.

Levi looks at Hange, "How many are we expecting?"

"Erwin didn't mention."

Levi rolls his eyes, clearly annoyed with the lack of intel. "We can't afford to get the both of us ambushed. I'll go take care of this one, you continue searching."

Their eyes meet for a short second, a wordless conversation ensuing between the two of them. With a nod, Levi orders the soldiers to lead him towards the 3 targets as Hange continues down her path, determined to not let even a single target escape their grasp.

As Hange was about to round a corner, she catches a glimpse of movement from her peripheral; shiny material glistening in the sunlight. She anticipated the person and was prepared to dodge the attack but whoever it was was clearly skilled as Hange unsuccessfully dodged the rough kick to her side, causing her to fall from her horse.

Nova left her behind as Hange scrambled back on her feet, immediately taking a defensive stance. She barely knew anything about her opponent so it was better to presume that it was someone stronger and much more skilled than her. Most people would think it a sure lost on Hange's part... _but she was used to that expectation by now,_ being the scrawniest in their training squad meant that the other soldiers constantly looked down on her, seeing her to be an easy target especially in hand-to-hand combat.

Defeat was not an unfamiliar outcome to Hange, nor was being matched up with someone whose skills were clearly superior to hers. But Hange valued learning, saw it to be the best means to strengthen one's self.

So how do you win against someone who clearly had the odds in their favor? use their very strength against them. It was an easy strategy Hange had used during her time in the training squad, the himbos placing all their bets on their strength and never controlling how much force they put into their punches, giving Hange the opportunity to use their own fist to collide with their faces in which Hange would remark as soon as she made her opponent fall, _"Don't bite the hand that feeds you."_ while the metaphor meant something different, it was the best she could use against a bunch of himbos who didn't utilize their brains enough.

The hooded person standing before her was different, the aura alone feeling much different from the himbos she had grown accustomed to. The stance telling her well enough that whoever this was was trained and knowledgeable enough in fighting. Hange did not relent her own stance, learning from Levi that a fighter never sacrifices his stance just to land a punch.

It felt like hours, the two of them just assessing each other, tension growing as they both waited for the other to make the first attack.

Hange heard the other person let out a barely audible _tch_ before swiftly approaching her. She grinned to herself, the one word reminding her of a 5'2 comrade of hers. The person's right arm inched closer to Hange's face, turning her body cross her arms in defense to avoid the hit to her face. Unfortunately for Hange, she had fallen into the person's trap as they quickly spun across Hange and utilized the momentum to land a kick to her back, making Hange topple forward. Hange let out a huff, clearly understanding that she had been fooled the first time around, but she wasn't going to give up just yet. She regained her footing and immediately took up an offensive stance, pushing on the ground to speed up, planning to land a punch on her opponent but seeing the counter fist attempting to punch her before she could, she dodges it effectively and in the process gives her opponent another opening to bring down the fist meant to push her and forcefully landing it on her stomach, making Hange wheeze as the air was knocked out of her system.

This fight was proving to be interesting as Hange's still mysterious opponent continued to land blow after blow on her, Hange was successful in returning the favour a couple of times as well. They took offense and defense alternatively, neither wanting to raise their white flag in surrender. Hange was beginning to wonder where the others could possibly be, she's only heard of 3 other targets so far, surely they couldn't be using all their manpower on merely 3 people? Hange sighed to herself, seeing that she had no other choice but to take this person on alone until back up came.

Somewhere along the fight, Hange had began to learn her opponent's patterns and strategies, being much more capable of dodging and landing her own punch and kicks. But she wasn't just focused on defeating this person in combat, she was now also determined to get the insulting hood off this person's face so she could put a face to the man she'd been fighting for who knows how long. She noticed that this person was smaller in height but Hange was not one to judge as humanity's strongest soldier was merely a 5'2 man with great strength.

Hange successfully grabbed hold of her opponent, throwing them to the ground, their hooding inching up just slightly showing a blonde strand of hair. _Blonde hair_

Making good of her opponent still being on the ground, Hange rushes to straddle them, pinning their hands to the ground. The figure beneath her tries to writhe free to no avail. With their constant attempt to break free from Hange's strong hold, their hood continued to fall of, showing more of their features. Hange first noted the pale complexion, then came the blue eyes shined brightly upon by the sunlight, glaring intensely back at her.

Her eyes widened greatly as the hood completely fell off her opponent's writhing form, "You're..." she mutters in disbelief.

"Hange!" she hears someone scream from a distance.

Instead of looking back towards him, Hange focuses on restraining the person beneath her, tightening her hold on _her_ wrist.

Levi approaches Hange's straddling form, pressing his boot on the mysterious person's face, forcibly turning their cheek to reveal the face. "Well what do you know..."

_"No one informed me today was ladies day out."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to be very vague about the fight because I can't write it for shit. believe me, I really tried!
> 
> Surprise surprise!!! Any guesses on who's gonna show up next?


	10. Chapter 10

They had succeeded in capturing a total of 4 people - 4 skilled _women_ who put up a good fight, leaving a number of their soldiers wounded. Hange was leading the group that was escorting the targets back to HQ while Levi and a few others stayed behind on cleanup duty.

The fights that ensued had cause quite the ruckus and they had managed to leave the district just as the MPs came, Levi as adamant as he was, had to intervene and answer whatever stupid questions the MPs would have. Hange was more than willing to do it but Levi had a sinister look on his face, clearly considering the amusement he ought to get from messing with the soldiers from the other regiment.

"Hey," one of the girls called out to Hange.

Hange turns back, meeting eyes with the brown-haired girl with freckles on her face - her mind instantly reminding of another woman with the same features. She brushes off her thoughts to focus on the woman who had called for her, Hange all but raises an eyebrow to address her.

"We're missing one person."

"Excuse me?" Hange replies in confusion.

The freckled girl rolls her eyes, "There are five of us." She blankly states.

Hange halts her horse and a wave of frustration hits her as she lets out a groan, "And why tell me this now? We could've gotten this over with and taken them in while we were still in the district."

She shrugs, "I didn't think we'd get captured."

"Your confidence was your downfall."

"I wouldn't be so if I didn't know what they're capable of." The girl dully replies, addressing her own group.

"Who is this person, what do they look like?" Hange asks wanting to get this mission over with.

"Cute." She replies with a smirk.

Hange rolls her eyes and roughly rubs her face, "Listen kid, I really am not in the mood to mess around with you."

"Oh what an indecent proposal, sir. I will have to reject all future invitations though as I am spoken for."

Hange remains silent, placing her goggles on her forehead, making all the soldiers hold their breaths in. Hange calmly climbs down her horse, inching closer towards the cart where the 4 ladies sat tightly restrained. In one swift movement, Hange has pulled the freckled marauder by the collar and thrown her off the cart and onto the ground with much force that the mischief in the girl's eyes was replaced with pain.

_"Do I look like I'm joking right now?"_

"Section Commander-" Moblit tries to intervene but with one glare from Hange instantly closes his mouth shut.

Everyone in the regiment knew better than to coax an angered or frustrated Section Commander Hange Zoë, in this state, the section commander was much more murderous than the captain.

After getting over the initial pain, the girl forced herself to sit upright, "Sheesh boss. Remind me to never cross you again." She laughs in between.

This does nothing to alleviate Hange's anger as she kneels infront of her, her face showing how genuinely pissed she was, "Are you going to play nice now? or must I treat you like a rag doll again?"

" _She_ is a petite blonde girl, unruly long hair and blue eyes. She's wearing an untucked white blouse and a beige long skirt. Not hard to miss, trust me."

Hange nods, turning to Moblit who stood a few inches away, "You heard her. Ride back and relay the information to Levi."

"Yes, Section Commander." Moblit rushes off to his own horse and rides back to the district.

Hange sighs, putting her glasses back on. She opens her eyes that show a softer gaze compared to earlier, "Sorry about earlier! I got carried away." She says lightly, helping the girl up on her feet and escorting her back to the cart. "By the way, What's your name?"

"Why would you wanna know?" The girl skeptically asks.

"Well if we're going to see each other often, I might as well know your name."

There's a joke tugging on the girl's lips but she dares not to say it in fear that the eccentric woman switch to her vicious demeanour again, "Ymir."

"Ymir...?"

"Just Ymir."

Hange nods her head in understanding and turns her head to Ymir with a smile, "Well then. It's nice to meet you, Ymir."

The kind and warmness in the section commander's sultry voice surprises Ymir as she turns to look away, a faint blush spreading across her cheeks.

They continue their travel back to HQ which took all of half an hour.

Hange leaves her squad to temporarily detain the girls in the dungeon as she makes her way to Erwin's office to report of today's mission.

She knocks twice with ease, hearing Erwin ask for a name and purpose, "It's Hange, sir. I'm here to make a report."

Hearing his permission to enter, she opens the door and walks in, closing it behind her gently. Erwin doesn't look up at her, instead continuing to finish the last of the mission reports he was doing before Hange interrupted. As soon as he puts his pencil down, he leans back into his chair with a sigh.

Hange just stood there, waiting for his orders, "Hange, it's just the two of us. You can relax." He addresses her, extending his arm as a sign of offering for her to sit.

She sits down on one of the chairs in front of Erwin's desk, "I didn't want to impose. even if we are friends, I don't want to abuse that in terms of ranks."

Erwin smiles in understanding, fixing his posture; elbows resting on the arms of his chair. "So, how'd it go?"

"We captured a total of four people though during our travel back one of them admitted that they are a group of five. Levi's squad is searching for the fifth one as we speak."

Erwin nods, encouraging her to continue, "I only observed one in action, the blonde one - you'll see _her_ later." His eyes show an amused glint at the mention though he says nothing to prod which confuses Hange.

"You're not as surprised as I thought you'd be."

"Should I have reason to be?"

Hange sighs, "They're girls. If I had to guess, they're probably within the same age range as our newest recruits. Though as I mentioned earlier that I only observed one, I am left to assume they they exhibit much more advanced skills than our recruits."

Erwin nods with a pleased smile, Hange is still confused by his reaction altogether. "You're wondering why I'm not more surprised."

"Is it that obvious?"

"Hange. I'm not surprised because of you."

"Me?" She stutters out.

Erwin stands up from his chair and walks toward the window in his office, "I've known you since we were mere trainees aspiring to be a part of change. I know what you're capable of - and you, my dear friend, have shown better results than most men in our regiment. There's a reason you're a section commander."

In the back of her head, Hange has always known that Erwin's reasoning for appointing her as section commander was within reason, it just so happens that there lurked as well the doubts and self-loathing she held for herself. Erwin notices the torn expression on her face and sighs, "If I didn't think you were a capable soldier, I wouldn't entrust you with a command nor would you be standing before me and reporting details of a mission gone exceptionally well. You are more capable than you give yourself credit for, Hange. _It has nothing to do with the fact that we are friends._ "

Erwin wasn't one to lie just to protect her feelings, the man in all his sadistic subtleties paid no heed to consideration of other people's feelings when it came down to making decisions for the benefit of humanity. Hange nods, letting the topic go.

"So, do you think they'd be a good fit?" He interrogates.

"I have no doubt they could be an asset."

There is a ghost of a smile on Erwin's face before he goes back to his passive stance, "Very well. I shall hope for non-aggressive negotiations with our guest later on." He says hinting that their conversation is ending.

In normal circumstances, Hange would've just gone with it and allowed Erwin to dismiss her, but today's revelations left her much bolder than usual with a stronger drive, "Erwin about that,"

He turns to face her, she gulps the fear she was feeling, "Should they decide to agree with your proposal. I'd like to request that they join under my command."

"You'll take the responsibility of handling them?"

Hange nods, a determined look on her face. Erwin has rarely seen his friend look this determined & driven, and while he was not one to make emotional decisions, he reasoned that entrusting the possible soon-to-be female squad to Hange was a wise choice as she was a capable section commander and he had a feeling that Hange was the best person for the job.

Erwin nods in agreement, "Alright then. I'll finish up here then go have a talk with our guest."

Hange salutes to the commander before proceeding to leave his office and go back to her own.

As soon as she sets foot in her room, her shoulders visibly relax as she trudges towards the couch, plopping down and closing her eyes. Today's mission had taken a lot out of her, not to mention that yesterday's activities from day to dawn had also been physically exhausting. Hange stretches her limbs, sighing when she feels a light crack here and there. After a few minutes of lazing around, she gets to her feet and sits back down on her usual chair and retrieves the paper she had tucked in the first drawer. She had some time before Levi would return and they start on the paperwork so she was determined to finish writing her letter now while she still could.

\-----------------------

Levi's squad had just wrapped up their search for the additional member, and he was in a particularly good mood after making the MPs go dizzy with his vague answers that went in circles.

He was slowly trudging his horse across the district when a somewhat familiar voice called him, he turned towards the voice and was welcomed with the sight of Isabel who was wearing a faint yellow dress with floral patterns, her hair tied up in a messy ponytail with a few strands on the side of her face - reminding him of another person. "Lady Isabel," He salutes with a lack of excitement.

Isabel smiles at his gesture, "What are you doing in the district today?"

"An errand. I could ask you the same as this district isn't visited often by people of your status."

"Oh. My sisters and I frequent this district for a certain tea shop."

Levi's eyes shine with interest at her words, Isabel did not miss the look, "If you'd like, you can join us for a short while."

He politely declined knowing that he was expected back in HQ to give a report and he didn't trust the soldiers enough to keep a good eye on their new detainees.

"Well then, I'll just have the section commander give you some packages of tea. I have an inkling you'd enjoy what this shop offers as well."

"There's no need, My Lady. I do not wish to impose."

"I insist, Captain."

Levi simply nods to show his gratitude, mentally noting to come back another time to check out the tea shop. He notices the way the lady's eyes scan across the area, "I do not wish to keep you long though I must ask, is he here with you?" she innocently asks.

The machines in Levi's minds whirs with confusion, not entirely sure who she could be referring to at the moment. "I'm sorry but... who are you asking about?"

"Section Commander Zoë."

 _Oh._ Levi immediately understands the situation at hand but does nothing to correct it, instead opting to answer her question.

"The section commander is not with me."

"Oh, would you by chance know where he is then?"

"Probably with the girls." He blankly replies.

An unknown emotion flashes through the lady's face but Levi had no idea what it could be. As quickly, it was gone, replaced with a trained smile, "I did say that I do not wish to keep you long. Well then, I will leave you to your work. Good day, Captain."

Levi salutes and watches the lady turn away and walk to the opposite direction, he is still confused by what just transpired but decides not to think too much of it as he still had duties to fulfill. He had no doubt that upon his return to HQ; an abundance of gossip, questions, and tension will swirl across the halls - it was already annoying him to just think about it.

\--------------------

Isabel returns to the tea shop where her sisters were currently immersed in a conversation of their own, Astoria turns upon noticing her presence, "Did you have a lovely talk with the commander?"

"The _section commander_ was no where to be seen."

"Oh? then what took you so long?" Eleanor asks.

She plops down on her seat dejectedly, "I bumped into the captain."

"The captain? is this the shorter one?" Astoria asks, sipping on her tea afterwards. Eleanor laughs at her sister's lack of decency to not mention the captain's height.

"Yes, Levi I believe is his name."

"Well did you at least ask him where could the section commander possibly be?"

" _Probably with the girls,_ he answered." Isabel crosses her arms on her chest and doesn't bother to hide her annoyance.

"Is that jealousy I see, sister?" Astoria teases.

"No, it is not! I have no reason to be jealous." she defends.

"If you say so."

"If you aren't jealous then perhaps you can finally give proper consideration for the commander?" Eleanor inserts, still not letting go of any chance to mention Commander Erwin.

"You know, Eleanor, with how much you choose to mention him, shouldn't I be allowed to ask you about any possible infatuations you may have with the commander? I wouldn't want to make my younger sister jealous by entertaining her little crush." Isabel grins, squeezing her sister's cheek.

"I do not have a crush on the commander!"

"Liar." Isabel easily replies.

"You are one to talk, Isabel." Astoria adds.

"I do not have a crush on the section commander!" Isabel defends, unknowingly using the same words her sister had.

Astoria smiles though hidden by her cup at both of her sister's blatant denials.

"Keep lying through your teeth, sisters. One of these days, you might actually fool me."


	11. Chapter 11

"Boss! Have you come to congratulate us?" The girl named Ymir greeted upon seeing Hange.

Hange couldn't help the smile that tugged at her lips as she chuckled at the girl's playful remark, "Hmm, I came to give you one last chance to back out." She jokes.

The two girls with Ymir paid no attention to her but the other one eyed her with puppy eyes, Hange turns to the other girl with a curious look, "And who might you be?"

"I'm Sasha Braus, sir!" The girl screams, flimsily saluting to her - her fist positioned wrongly. Ymir had probably noticed it too as she corrected her friend's stance.

Hange nods, "It's nice to meet you, Sasha. And you two?" She turns towards the other two this time who continued their act of ignoring her.

"That would be Mikasa and Annie, Sir. Forgive their behaviour, I assure you they mean no disrespect - well at least not Mikasa." Ymir defends the two.

She eyes the blonde that she had fought out in the district, "Are you Annie?" Hange tries to initiate conversation once again.

The blonde tchs at her like she did early on the day and Hange all but laughs at her response, she was used to this kind of behavior having been friends with Levi for years now, Annie's behavior did not faze her in the slightest.

"You were a formidable opponent out there, Annie. I must admit I was worried that I wouldn't be able to take you down on my own."

"You got lucky." Annie mutters, still not turning to face her. Hange settles for the limited response the blonde gave and turns her attention to Ymir who was the most receptive.

"I assume the commander has briefed you on what is to happen in the future?"

Ymir nods, "We'll be joining your squad, yeah?"

"Yeah. I went out of my way to request that."

"Aww boss. Don't tell me you already have a soft spot for us?" Ymir teases.

Hange laughs at her boldness. It's been a while since she's interacted with a ballsy and witty person as soldiers were wary to be on friendlier terms with her despite her insistence to do so.

"What I have, Ymir, is a growing headache due to you four."

"Speaking of, have your men found our fifth one?" a flash of concern comes across Ymir's eyes, Hange immediately notices.

"The other squad should be here in a few more minutes with her." Hange informs.

Ymir lets out a sigh of relief and gives Hange an appreciative nod.

"I'm sorry to intrude in your conversation but... will we be given food soon?" The girl named Sasha asks, slightly hiding behind Ymir.

Ymir pats her head, "This one might be your biggest headache, Boss. She _loves_ to eat."

Hange smiles fondly at Sasha, "I'll have my men escort you to the mess hall once we finish discussion with your fifth member. I do hope she'll easily agree to our proposal as you did."

"You don't have to worry about her, Boss. Just tell her that Ymir already agreed."

A wordless conversation between Ymir and Hange ensues as the two look each other in the eye; Hange searching for a trail of dishonesty at her words while Ymir only radiates a look of assurance. Hange is still adamant about trusting these people, after the trouble they've caused, who could blame Hange for feeling that way? But she couldn't deny that it was easy to talk to them; when she overlooked their actions, she understood that they did what was necessary to survive - regardless of whether it was immoral or not. They were living just as Hange did, and that was something that made the group feel like Hange's responsibility causing her to volunteer in handling the group of marauders.

"I'll trust you on that, Ymir."

Ymir nods and Hange turns to leave the dungeon. She bumps into Moblit on her way to the commander's office, Moblit seemingly on his way to fetch her, "Section Commander!" He screams.

"Yes yes Moblit. I'm on my way to Erwin's office as we speak."

Moblit visibly relaxes as his shoulders slump in the slightest, Hange felt sorry for her personal assistant. As time passed, Hange realized that Moblit went above and beyond as her personal assistant, at times acting like a guardian who protected and took care of her. He was one of the few who knew of her _circumstances_ and he never used it against her, always defending her honour and making sure she was taken care of as she couldn't be bothered to look after her own well- being.

"Do me a favor and ride to this address. There's a small opening in the forest connecting to this place where you can enter without getting caught, it'll lead you easily to the back door, give it to this specific person only. Understood?"

Moblit warily holds the letter like it held the deepest and darkest secret as he turned to look at her, "Don't worry, Moblit. A few hours without you won't be the death of me." She reassures him.

Moblit nods, tucking the letter in his breast pocket before saluting and heading out to deliver the piece of paper.

Hange trudges forward to Erwin's office, she doesn't bother to knock this time and immediately enters the room where Levi stood by the window, Erwin sat at his chair, and a _very_ small blonde girl stood across him. "Glad you could join us, section commander." Erwin announces.

Levi merely glances at her while the blonde girl looked petrified to be in a room with three soldiers of high rankings, "Have you told her her choices?" Hange asks.

Erwin nods, "Our dear guest Krista has been insisting on discussing her options with her friends first before agreeing to anything."

_Ah. So this is what Ymir meant._

Hange turns towards the girl who warily eyed her, "Ymir already agreed to it. I just came from visiting them."

The petite girl eyes her, clearly assessing if Hange could be trusted to be saying the truth. Seeing that she was still doubtful of her intentions, Hange decided to speak up again, "Krista, right?"

The girl nods in response. "Should you agree to go along with our proposal, you will be joining your friends under my command - I assure you we have no intentions of separating you from any of them."

Krista bows her head to look at the floor, "It's not that." she whispers, her voice barely above a whisper.

Erwin raises an eyebrow, "If I may ask, what seems to be the problem then?"

"There's a reason I didn't join the fight today, sir. **I'm weak.** I know that Mikasa and the others piqued your interest because of their skills and that is the only reason we've been brought here instead of being handed over to the military police... But Commander, I am _nothing_ like them. I'm weak and I can't put up a fight as good as them, I can barely throw a punch without losing my balance... I'd be more of a liability than an asset to your regiment, sirs."

Hange eyed the young girl with a mixed look of pity and concern. She reminded her of someone very dear to her, someone she wanted to protect - the reason she embraced this lie of a life to begin with. She saw so much of that person in the blonde girl, and despite how different their features were, their kindness and souls were moulded the same.

Yesterday and today's events had been physically exhausting, and it felt like some kind of odd punishment the universe was giving her to have her ponder on her emotional convictions as well. It seemed that she had been making a lot of emotional decisions today despite her reasoning that what she was choosing to do was still for the benefit of humanity.

"Well, brat, it'd be too good to be true if everyone in that stupid group of yours was blessed to be skilled." Levi spoke up for the first time since Hange entered. He still didn't look their way, opting to stare out the window where there was a good view of the cadets training on the ground.

"We never limit our acceptance of soldiers to the talent they have to offer; If they are weak, if they are stupid - they are still welcomed. We are too scarce in manpower to be picky about who we allow in. But what we do not allow within our ranks, are people without determination and a strong will. Despite the stupidity and weakness we've seen across the years, all our soldiers have shown great mental strength and determination to devote themselves to this cause. And if they don't at first? They eventually do. We see death, blood, tears, and grief like it is a normal thing for people to feel on a daily basis, _but it shouldn't be._ That's where we get our sense of purpose from, to change that normalcy we have created; we are too damn tired of losing people to those shitty dirty titans. I may be what people deem as humanity's strongest soldier... but this regiment - _our men_ are humanity's hope for a life with a better sense of normal. Do you understand that?"

To say Hange was left dumbfounded would be an understatement. She's known Levi to be a man of few words, those limited phrases packing a punch at best. This is the most she's heard him talk since they became comrades and she was surprised to hear such poetics from her friend.

_Who would've thought that the man who could barely read a word when they first met is the same man who could now make his words dance with such elegance._

"The captain is right, Krista. We-"

"I'd be honoured to join, sirs." Krista cut in before Erwin could add his own patriotic words.

 _Today was proving to be quite the show,_ Hange thought to herself.

"Since that's settled, how about we go ahead for some late lunch? Sasha has been begging for food."

Erwin nods his head and allows for Hange to escort Krista out of his office. Levi was about to follow the two before Erwin called his attention, Levi sighs and turns to the commander.

"I must admit that I wasn't expecting you to speak so much." Erwin comments.

Levi shrugs, "We got the answer we wanted, didn't we?"

"That we did. Thank you... Levi."

Levi restrains himself from reacting differently to Erwin's words, despite his heartbeat ringing loudly in his ears. 

\--------------------------

Moblit had reached the place quickly within the hour, asking for the presence of one Isabel Black from a helper who happened to be entering the mansion. He recognized the name to be that of the woman they had bumped into when they had visited a shop. He was unsure what his boss' relation to the lady could be but that was none of his business anyway, if the section commander deemed it irrelevant or unnecessary to explain it to him then he would respect it.

The familiar lady soon opened the backdoor, the smile that was plastered on face immediately fading as soon as she realized it was not the section commander. She immediately displayed a kind smile - though Moblit knew it to be fake, "Lady Black?" Moblit asks just to be sure.

" _That_ would be my mother, feel free to call me Isabel if you please."

Moblit salutes to the lady, "Lady Isabel, I have a letter addressed to you from section commander Hange." He informs, pulling the delicate piece of paper out of his breast pocket and offering it to her.

Her eyes immediately light up upon hearing this and excitedly grab the letter out of his hands. Isabel decided that she would read the letter when there were no prying eyes to see her, "I must admit that I had hoped to receive this from the section commander personally." 

"I apologize on behalf of the section commander. They have been busy with negotiations all day." 

_Sugarcoating that your section commander is out conversing with other women? Typical of an assistant._ Isabel thinks to herself. she shudders at Astoria's earlier comment about her being jealous, forcing herself to rid of this consideration, she addresses the man once more. 

"Could you wait a few more minutes? I have a few things I wish for you to bring back to your superiors."

"Of course, missus."

Isabel rushes back inside and retrieves the lavender-scented paper she had written on merely an hour ago as well as a packaged box. She sealed the items in a small cloth. On her way back to the man who patiently waited for her, she could not help the thoughts that filled her mind; would the section commander bother to read her words? would he give her letter a thoughtful glance? She imagined a vivid image of him eyeing her letter before dropping it somewhere of no importance. She could not help but entertain the idea that the section commander would not spare her letter a moment, Isabel could not deny the possibility that he was _popular_ with women, after all, she has seen people who had a way with their words enchant the people around them - Astoria being a good example of that. The section commander was a charming person that had a sense of mischief hidden behind his stoic and mysterious demeanour, something women she has been surrounded with would love to chase after. Not to mention the warmth and genuineness the section commander could emanate with his gaze. It had become clear to Isabel that section commander Hange Zoë was a risk to her sanity. She should've known this with how easily he had wrapped her around his finger - in one night compared to the many days men have tried to court or hoped for her to look their way. Hange had easily entranced her, and she just let him. 

She felt anger boil deep within her; not directed at Hange but at herself, she had allowed her heart to be so exposed to him, and that was her own fault. She declared then and there, with her letter filled with affection and trust, that this was the last time she'd allow herself to be so vulnerable with the section commander. She thought he could be different, while it could still be true, he did not deserve this amount of rawness from her just yet. _protect your heart,_ Isabel reminded herself as she walked back to the back door of their mansion.

Upon returning to the soldier waiting for her, "Here you go. The letter is for the section commander while the box is for captain? Levi." she informs, though a bit unsure in calling Levi captain as she was unsure how their titles worked.

Moblit nods in understanding, "I will make sure that these items get to them in good condition."

"Thank you, good sir." She replies in appreciation.

"You may just call me Moblit or even Berner if you please, miss."

"Very well then. I wish you a safe travel back, Moblit."

He salutes once more before getting back on his horse and riding off to the distance.

Isabel returns back to the comfort of her private space, excited to read what the section commander had written. She was just about to open the letter when there was a knock on her door, "Lady Isabel? I've come to help you prepare for tonight's affairs." Daisy says from the other side of the door.

Isabel sighs, she had momentarily forgotten of her responsibility for the night.

Lady Black had left her no choice but to join Astoria at tonight's event, Eleanor was not to come as she was not yet of marrying age which meant her presence tonight was not required nor should it be expected by the men in search of a wife.

"Come in!"

Daisy entered her quarters, holding her gown high and off the floor. The gown was exquisite in all its delicacy; It was a faint shade of lilac with off the shoulder loose-fitting pleated sleeves with elegant floral patterns, and an alluring corset that would surely accentuate her petite waist in the best of ways. While her mother's prospects when it came to the men her daughters danced with was far from demanding and of the highest standard, it could not be denied that her taste in clothing was exceptional - it was no wonder that her daughters always managed to catch the eyes of men as their looks could not be parred by any other.

"It's beautiful..."

Daisy nods in agreement, a smile donning her pale features, "I have no doubt that you would look most elegant in it, ma'am."

"You flatter me, Daisy." She walks to the middle of her room where a mirror was placed before her, "Well then, Daisy, you know what to do. Do your worst!" she exclaims.

Daisy lightly giggles at her mistress' usual remark, "Your mother will never let me hear the end of it if I were to indulge your request, ma'am."

"Good. You and I will have to endure the same fate every day then." Isabel jokes in return.

 _The Ball of the Unmarried,_ as Isabel had insisted to call it. Surely something interesting would happen tonight? Something that could hopefully keep her thoughts clouded from the man who had invaded it too often.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any idea what could possibly happen at the ball?
> 
> As always, your thoughts are most welcome - positive or negative, I accept all! I would love to hear what you think of this book so far and what could possibly be written better.
> 
> I must inform that updates may become slower in the weeks to come as a new term will soon be starting for me, uni is a hindrance to my writing


	12. Chapter 12

The ball was just as Isabel had expected it to be. A bunch of women fanning themselves while attempting to seductively glance at the men who met in groups, laughing over their past activities or boasting about their wonderful adventures. Isabel felt nauseous with the profound behaviors she was subjected to tolerate for an entire night, if it weren't for Astoria's constant whispers in her ear that temporarily amused her, she feared that any man who would so much as approach her would have to face her wrath.

Fortunately for her, their name had its pros as men though as brave as they may be had difficulties approaching the two women.

It was clear to anyone with eyes that Astoria and Isabel Black were the diamonds of the night, to approach them meant having the utter confidence that one could par with such quality. Tonight's ball was exclusive for the daughters and sons, it was a night that many looked forward to as it meant there would be no hovering mothers who would sell their daughters off as best as they could to the men. Without the animalistic mothers, the men were left to enjoy their peace while the women tried their best to allure even one's eye.

"My lady," Isabel was paying not much attention to her surroundings and was surprised by Kasius' presence. She bit her tongue to restrain her words as well as the roll of her eyes while Astoria lightly pinched her hand, clearly aware of her sister's internal behavior, "My lord, might I say that you are a sight tonight." Astoria compliments, giving a curtsy.

Kasius smiles at her words, and takes hold of Astoria's hand to place a short kiss.

"A sight for sore eyes," Isabel whispers into her sister's ear as she moves to leave the two be.

Kasius was also born into an influential family, it came as no surprise to Isabel that the man immediately sought after her sister. What did surprise her was Astoria's receptiveness, she had subtly commented on it from time to time, one night having a proper conversation with her older sister.

_"Surely you are in no hurry to marry? should you not keep your doors open for other potential suitors?" Isabel asked one night as she sat on a chair in Astoria's room._

_"Do you not agree with Kasius?"_

_"Does it matter if I do? My only point is it seems you have become set on Kasius and give no further thought to other suitors!"_

_"Sometimes I forget it is your first time in the scene," Astoria giggles. She cups her sister's face with her delicate hands, "You're right. I should keep my door open for others, but I do not want to. Not if it means I have to put up with men who see me no more than a wife who will bear their child or accompany them at parties, I do not wish to simply be seen as a pretty face or a prized trophy. You may not agree that Kasius is the best - the cream of the crop, but he sees me better than most. He admires me and wishes to give me what I so desire, that is more than I could ever ask for."_

_"So you will settle for that?"_

_"I do not have any other choice, do I?"_

_"You can choose not to give your hand." Isabel suggests. She had always thought about it since being of marrying age, opting to not get married. She knew it to be an idiotic thought and yet she could not help but consider it; they came from an influential family, no matter how controversial it would be, surely no one would outright shun her. After all, she was still a Black, and that name still bears weight no matter where she goes._

_Astoria smiles fondly at Isabel, "Oh but I do want to get married, my dear sister. Isabel... you do not yet understand how different we are,"_

_"Nonsense! We get along well, people have even said that we are a carbon copy of each other," Isabel defends._

_"They mean well, though... do they really know us? People may say that out of decency, what with how we were raised have you not considered that those could all be but empty words?"_

_"So how are we different, Astoria?"_

_"That is for you to discover, Isabel." Astoria taps her nose, "You are a clever woman, sister. I have no doubt of the depths your mind will seek knowledge."_

_Isabel huffs at her sister's words, "You're being cryptic again."_

_Astoria simply giggles, "I just enjoy confusing your thoughts."_

It was a thought Isabel pondered on for many days, how did Astoria deem them to be different? what did she mean when she decided to settle for Kasius?

As she stood in the spotlight herself, she came to understand one of the two questions that lingered.

Kasius was no dreamy man, but he thought highly of her sister - like she put the stars in the sky for him, _like she were his light._ Kasius had differentiated himself in the way he regarded Astoria, his words never empty and always full of genuine adoration for her. He could be a bit of an airhead but for Astoria, his focus was sharp and all on her. He wanted to give her all she desired and Astoria was grateful for that.

They may not be the ultimate sappy love story like the ones in Isabel's book, but she had yet to see one with her own eyes; perhaps that was a kind of love only for the books, there was a reason that many fawned over such novels - it was a romance of a life that they were not fortunate to experience for themselves.

Isabel sauntered across the hall alone, deciding last minute that she was due to get some refreshments. She stood by the table enjoying her drink when she heard a clear of a throat, attempting to get her attention. She held her breath for a few seconds, closing her eyes and allowing her eyes to roll in annoyance before turning to whoever had the balls to get her attention. Her eyes went wide for a millisecond before she regained her composure again, "Lord Maxwell? I was not expecting your presence tonight."

Lord Maxwell was an older man who had already been married, given the context of tonight's ball, he was the least she had expected to see.

He paid no attention to her initial words, "Lady Isabel, how lovely you look tonight."

He took a hold of her hand like Kasius had done to her sister and much to her disgust, placed his lips on her hand. She mentally noted that there was no way, she would sleep without washing her hand thoroughly. "You flatter me, My Lord." She says with a trained smile, though this goes beyond the man.

He offers what he probably assumes to be a charming smile though to Isabel, it was simply a retched view she had to tolerate - forcing herself not to fake vomit at his obvious attempt to make her swoon. "I must confess that I have been hoping to meet your eyes from a far, even during the ball your family had graciously hosted."

"Well, I have been told it is not a good look to allure the eyes of another woman's husband." Isabel replied with ease, picking up somewhat on Astoria's way with words that could contain venom in them should she will it.

Lord Maxwell simply laughs, taking it as a joke as Isabel had turned it to be despite the truth in what she had said, "Oh but I am unspoken for, My Lady."

She couldn't stop the way she shook in disgusts, he had called her the very name she thought to be repulsive. Lord Maxwell however interpreted the body language as a good sign, like he was able to emit such a sensual reaction out of her. He holds up his right hand, displaying the lack of a ring.

"I have always seen you to be a true beauty, My Lady. Ever since I was a teen."

Isabel could feel the drink she had drank come up to her throat, it was through sheer will that she did not spit it out upon hearing his words, "And I believe I was... a toddler?"

She could not take it anymore, the further she attempted to tolerate his words and presence brought her to the brink of shedding her facade and outright kicking him in between his legs. "I must cut our conversation short as I believe my sister is calling for me." she reasons before bursting into a brisk walk away from him, she could still hear his footsteps following her.

Isabel could not see Astoria and she was beginning to feel panic in the pit of her stomach, her fists were clenched and she feared that she may cause a scene if ever she were to be face to face with that retched lord again. She heard his voice nearer and was just about ready to throw a punch in the lord's direction when she felt a firm yet gentle hold on her wrist along with an arm wrapped across her waist, "Lady Isabel, I believe I am due for that dance you promised?" He spoke loudly.

She looked up to whoever it was, appreciative of his obvious effort to save her from Lord Maxwell though also uneasy with the arm that held her waist. Ocean blue eyes sparkled from above her, the wavy blonde hair that was brushed back a familiar feature, "Commander..." Isabel mutters in surprise. He smiles reassuringly at her.

"Lady Isabel..." She heard Lord Maxwell call.

A wordless conversation was shared between the two as they stared into each other's eyes. Erwin conveyed a look reassuring her that he'd get her out of this mess as Isabel's switched from surprise to a look of appreciation. She nods faintly in his direction so that only he could see it before turning to Lord Maxwell, "I'm sorry, My Lord. I'd forgotten that I promised this man a dance or three."

And with that, Erwin escorts her away from him. His hands firmly comfortable on her waist, "Thank you, Commander..." She whispers with her head down.

Erwin smiles though she is not able to see it, "There is no need to thank me, Lady Isabel. Though I feel I must say this now that you do not need to dance with me if you do not feel comfortable doing so. I can escort you to your sister as it seems you were looking for her?"

Isabel shakes her head and finally looks up to him, "I owe you a dance or three, do I not?"

Erwin is surprised as he has heard that the younger Black was not one for dancing and not many have had the fortune of sharing one with her. Upon regaining his senses, he smiles at her, "Then dance we shall."

He leads her to the dance floor where Isabel easily spots her sister who was dancing with Kasius. She wrapped her arms around his neck with ease which caught him off guard as the last time they had danced - which Erwin knew was not to the lady's consent, she had settled to place one hand on his broad shoulder while the other gently held his hand.

"I apologize in advance if I step on your foot, Commander. I do not frequently dance you see." She admits.

Erwin lightly shakes his head before offering a smile, "Just follow my lead, Miss."

Without wasting another moment, Erwin gently sweeps her off her feet, making Isabel squeak out a yelp in pure shock. Erwin led them to a dance with ease and sooner rather than later, Isabel found herself swaying across the ballroom in an airy dance. Every time she almost stepped on him, he would pick her off the floor and she would laugh at his antics. The dance was easy, it lasted long and yet it felt short to Isabel. She had never enjoyed as much as she did in that moment and she graciously thanked the commander in her mind for that.

The two were caught up in their own dance and did not notice the people that had begun to watch their display from all sides of the dance floor. Some had opted to stop in order for the spotlight to shine brighter on the two, everyone who watched were bewitched at the sight of the young lady dancing with the commander - holding in their breaths every time he put her up in the air as he turned. They danced across the entire floor and it was only when the music stopped and they heard applauses did they realize they were being watched.

Isabel was embarrassed to say the least and put her head on Erwin's chest while laughing, hiding her blush from their audience. Erwin looked at the people with a smile, meeting the eyes of Astoria Black who offered him a kind smile and a nod which he returned.

Once the excitement had died down and more people entered the dance floor, Erwin escorted Isabel to the side where she sat on one of the chairs. He stood in front of her unsure if he were allowed to accompany her further.

Sensing this, Isabel took the initiative, "Sit with me, Commander."

He took the seat next to her as he grabbed two glasses of water from the server who had passed by, he offered one to her which she gladly took.

"I have to confess, I have never had that much fun dancing as I did tonight."

Erwin smiled, proud of himself that he was of good company to the lady, "As Commander of one of the regiments, I have often had to dance at the Ball of the Regiments." He shares with her.

"I did not know that there was a ball for the regiments," she admits.

"It is not as celebrated as the elegant parties you are used to. After all, people despise and judge us for taking a moment of peace for ourselves _as we waste their taxes._ " He bitterly replies.

Isabel feels sorry for his words but chooses not to show it, she feels that offering her pity would not be appreciated by the commander, "I think it to be hypocritical of them."

"I beg your pardon?"

"Do you need find it hypocritical in the least? If any are worthy of spending a moment of peace, it is you people who constantly knock on death's doorstep willingly while the rest of us continue on with our mundane lives - the more fortunate of us worrying about marriage and connections while you worry if you will live to see another day and such. We sit and dance here because we are complacent in the knowledge that behind these walls we are safe, but what about you? You venture out of the walls, killing those monsters so that we may have our peace, do you not? Who are these people to judge when you decide to have a sense of calm in your own lives?"

"Lady Isabel..." is all Erwin says in reply. Not expecting the Lady of all people to defend his and his regiment in particular's honour.

" **If** I had a choice, if I could choose a different fate and be a man, I would. I can not stand to pretend that this secure yet mundane life is all I desire for the rest of my days. My life cannot just be this, I want it to mean more. I want to see the outside of these walls as you do, I want to die protecting something of worth. I want to have a different destiny because honestly? anything is better than being a woman who's only duty is to be married off and spend her days being a woman beside a man."

Erwin ponders on her words, the current events in his regiment - confidential in nature - crossing his mind. "Are you saying that if you were given a chance, you would like to become a soldier? A part of the Survey Corps?" He asks her genuinely.

Isabel turns to face him, holding his stare with as much determination she could muster, "Without a doubt."

 _He feels it._ The all too familiar turn of the machines in his head, the quickening pace of his heartbeat as it drums in his ears, the visions in his mind that are enough to cloud him temporarily.

Erwin stands from his seat, "I regretfully must leave now, Missus. It was truly a great pleasure to dance with you tonight."

Isabel offers him a kind smile, "You have made this night utterly tolerable and I cannot thank you enough for saving me."

He salutes to her one last time, "It's part of my duty." He says before walking in big strides out of the hall.

_Erwin Smith had a new gamble in mind._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did anyone expect these turn of events because I surely didn't. I had no initial plans of inserting Erwin in this chapter but as I continued to write, it's like he let himself in the narrative so I just went with the flow, it worked to my benefit as I can see how this would connect well with future chapters. 
> 
> Do you have any idea what Erwin's next gamble could possibly be? Let me hear your assumptions as well as your thoughts! Hope you liked this chapter. :)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize in advance for another chapter without Hange and Isabel fluff. I did say that this would be an awful slowburn.

"To reiterate, the detained have agreed to our proposal and shall be training alongside our soldiers effective immediately. I plan to inform the cadets at today's gathering of the current conditions; The female squad are a group of offenders who are spending their suspension time with us instead of with the MPs _for confidential reasons the cadets need not know._ And as such, only the people present in this room are aware of the true circumstances of these people, I expect you all to sign a confidentiality clause without protest. If you have any objections, step forward _now._ "

No one in the room dared to move, eyes fixed on the three superiors who stood before them. Hange stood behind Erwin to his left while Levi was at his right. The room consisted of men that Erwin had appointed into position of power, they were people he trusted and who gave their confidence in him in return. No one questioned Erwin's decisions because they have never seen his gambles go up in shambles, even when they were faced with a metaphorical wall - Erwin always found a way to climb over it.

Hange admired that about her friend, the calculating sadistic commander despite constantly putting his life and honour on the line always seemed to pull through with the risks and turned the favour to his side. That's what made him a respected veteran and leader after all, his willingness to make sacrifices - no matter how big or small, all for the sake of giving them a better chance in the future.

She was taken out of her thoughts when she noticed Erwin's arm extending to her, an unspoken command to make her step forward, "I have appointed Section Commander Hange Zoë with the responsibility of keeping an eye on the female cadets. I have no doubt in my mind that they will not disappoint me."

Hange shivers at his clear expectations from her, a chorus of nods reply in acknowledgement at his words, and Hange feels the figurative weight on her shoulders get heavier. She keeps in the sigh that attempted to come out. now was not the time to show doubt or weakness.

Once everything had been said and the confidentiality clauses signed, the rest of the high ranking officers left Erwin's room, leaving the trio to reflect on the meeting.

Levi silently watched as Erwin collected the signed papers and tucked it into one of his drawers. "Hange, I do believe the cadets are expecting your presence on the training grounds." Erwin speaks up, hinting at Hange's dismissal. She wordlessly nods and salutes to him before looking to her other friend and nodding at him as well. As Hange left the room, Erwin and Levi were left alone.

He watched him with hawk-like focus, observing his every move. "Levi, I don't think you can melt me with your stare any more if you tried." Erwin breaks the silence.

Levi doesn't reply and instead continues to watch him, _He can see it clear as day_. Present was the brewing storm of his unspoken thoughts, the way his blue eyes would flash before he tamed it once more, the faint smile that tugged on his lips - Levi knew in that moment that this idiot had another gamble on his mind. Gambles seemed to be the only thing that could consume Erwin in the most indulgent way.

He dared not to mention it, waiting for Erwin to admit it in his own time. Levi was never overly enthusiastic about his stupid gambles anyway, they always brought a certain level of risks and Levi had enough dangers to last him several lifetimes.

"Have I mentioned to you about last night's ball?" Erwin asks, still not looking in Levi's direction.

"No."

"I bumped into Isabel Black."

Levi raises an eyebrow at the mention of the lady's name, "And?"

"Well I didn't bump into her as much as I stopped her from swinging a punch at some old geezer who clearly was trying to take a stride at her."

Levi winces at the vision that unceremoniously popped into his head. He knew from the numbered encounters he's had with the lady that Isabel was much younger than them - he estimated that she was 7 years younger at the least. For Erwin to call this man _old_ meant that he went beyond that number, in his mind, this man looked like someone as old as the former superiors or could've been worse.

"I don't follow your line of thought." Levi admits.

"I danced with her." is all Erwin replies.

He was beginning to get annoyed by the lack of proper thoughts, he didn't know what Erwin wanted him to make of the limited answers he's given. Through gritted teeth, Levi replies, "And?"

"I enjoyed it."

An unknown feeling entered Levi's system and he didn't enjoy the foreign feeling. It felt numbing yet constricted his throat and heart at the same time. What the hell was going on with him? He surmised it to be due to his aggravation at the irrelevance of this conversation.

"Okay? what do you want me to do about it? Erwin, I'm not here to play friend with you right now as much as I just want to know what the fuck this has to do with the obvious gamble you have in your head. Are you gonna share it with the class or not? If not, I will respectfully take my leave, _Commander._ " Levi was surprised at his own words, he didn't understand where the sudden surge to snap came from. Sure he's easily annoyed by pointless talk, but this was Erwin, no matter how stupid the conversations got, Levi had never given this sort of treatment to Erwin out of respect for rank and as a friend.

Erwin smiled to himself, "My apologies. _I wanted to see if you'd get jealous._ " He whispered the last part but Levi still heard it. damn his heightened senses.

Erwin picks up his thought, finally ready to talk coherently and ignored his previous statement, "You're right. I have another gamble in mind." He finally admits.

Levi feels disappointment creep in at the discontinuation of Erwin's previous statement but immediately masks it in exchange for his captain persona, focusing back on the important matters at hand.

"Last night with the lady gave me a new perspective, you see. She said some things that admittedly piqued my interest." Erwin started as Levi nodded his head, encouraging him to continue.

"With the recent capture and addition of the female squad... _Do you not see it to be time we allowed women to join the regiments of their own free will?_ "

Levi's eyes widened in realization of what Erwin was considering to do. Sure it wasn't deadly in nature, but it was still a risky game to play. The fact that they still had to lie about the new squad's circumstances as well as Hange continuing to live under a false story were bright evidences of that.

He swims in his own thoughts; thinking of all kinds of good and bad this new gamble could bring to light - the possibility that it would harm Hange and he could lose her in a blink of an eye suddenly not an extremely far-fetched thought.

"Why now?" He asks, desperate to understand why Erwin would suddenly take such a risk on now when they've calmly handled the situation with the female cadets as well as continued to prosper despite what Hange has had to sacrifice and submit herself to.

"Then when?" Erwin replies with a question of his own. "We know better than most that being complacent is a much more dangerous tendency than attacking the situation head on. If we act now, we can still turn the tides to our favor," _Ah of course._ Erwin has thought this through and Levi knew he was right about that. That was the reason their gambles didn't manage to fuck them over so horribly, they took it while they could still cease to the upper hand.

"You never know how it could play out, Erwin. Surely you've considered that in doing this, you're saying that you're willing to sacrifice Hange..."

Erwin turns to look at Levi for the first time since they started this conversation, his eyes not giving away what he was feeling or thinking. His look was masked and while Levi often did it, he was displeased when he was on the other end of it. Annoyed that no matter how hard he tried - he could not see any sign of remorse on Erwin's face.

"I'm prepared to make that sacrifice." Erwin admits.

Levi could not help the way he held his breath at the man's admission. "You're really okay with the possibility of ousting Hange?"

Erwin looks at Levi with sole determination in his eyes, "I could be giving them a chance to live their truth."

"Or you could bring the world down on them." Levi reminded.

He felt tense. Erwin has always been awfully convicted in his gambles and while Levi did not agree all the time, he had no problem following through - trusting in Erwin's judgement like it was second nature to him. But this was different, it was more personal as he had easily admitted to himself. Hange wasn't just anybody, Hange was someone Levi cherished even though he didn't admit it with words, in his actions it was clear to everyone that he would die protecting them.

"It's called a gamble for a reason, Levi. You're right to say that we never know how it will play out, but that is why we diligently and patiently wait before we make any moves do we not?"

The room seemed to be closing in as Levi found it hard to control his breath and it was through the constant strain of his clenched fist that he was tethered to reality. He paid no more attention to Erwin, choosing to break respect for ranking and trudged towards the door to exit the commander's office.

"Levi," Erwin called out.

Levi stopped in his tracks, his hand still clasped around the handle, "You should know that I care deeply about Hange as well. I would never leave them to face the world alone, _even if this ends up not in our favour._ "

With that final statement, Levi exits the room. Taking wide steps to wherever his feet led him. He ended up at the stairs of the tower and as he peered into one of the windows, he had a clear view of Hange who was currently engrossed in training with the female cadets. He felt warmth in his chest at the sight but it was instantly replaced with dread as the earlier conversation invaded his mind once more.

He continued to watch Hange as her messy hair was even more messed up by the breeze as she dodged every punch thrown her way, her glasses placed on the grass while she had her goggles on as she personally joined the hand-to-hand combat. He saw the determination in her eyes and was pleased to see the fruition of her years of diligent training come to light as she put up an entertaining fight with the cadet, ending with her as victor. Levi allowed the smile to grace his lips, watching his friend conquer and gain the respect from the new cadets. Hange deserved it; for the sacrifices they've made, the lies they continue to live with, the burden on her shoulders that grew heavier with every passing second. Levi knew with his entire soul that there was no one more deserving of respect than Hange Zoë.

"Never stop fighting, Hange." Levi whispers as if Hange could hear his words.

\-------------------------

Hange had stepped out of Erwin's office, her feet easily bringing her to the grounds where the small group sat on the grass waiting for her arrival.

Ymir turned to the nearing figure, a smirk immediately donning on her lips upon realizing it was the section commander, "Took you long enough, boss."

Hange gives a smirk of her own, still amused by Ymir's playful nature. Sasha and Krista smile at her while Mikasa and Annie simply regard her with a glance - progress, Hange thought to herself.

It had only been over a day since the girls came so she had expected this much resistance, though she was thankful that the other three seemed to give her warmer regards.

"You girls done sitting on your asses?" she questions playfully.

With that, Ymir jumps up to her feet, offering a helping hand to Krista who happily accepted it. Mikasa and Annie shared a look before following Ymir's lead.

Hange led them to wider area on the grounds. Since she's already seen the reports on their ODM gear skills, she decided now would be a good time to gauge their combat skills as well. She had only seen what Annie was capable of so far and she was pretty impressed with the level of skill the blonde showed. That wasn't her only intention in choosing to do hand-to-hand combat however.

"Clearly, there is still a level of distrust and resistance here. I wouldn't blame you if you were to question my authority since we know nothing about each other."

The group nods at her words in acknowledgement of the truth, "Which is why I'm giving you the opportunity now. Anyone who wants to challenge my authority can face me in hand-to-hand combat. If you beat me, I won't force you to comply under my authority. Seems like a fair wager, doesn't it?"

Ymir shrugs her shoulder in agreement, "Well, I don't really mind following whatever your orders are. As long as it's not from the shorty who always looks like he has a stick up his ass." she reasons. _What an impression, Levi._ Hange thinks to herself.

"Well... you did give me an extra potato..." Sasha shyly comments, hiding behind Ymir a bit like she had the previous day.

"You've been very nice and respectful since we came here." Krista adds with a smile.

Hange smiles in appreciation of their kind words, "Well then..." the black-haired girl steps up, taking her jacket off in the process.

"Guess, I'll be the first to have a go?"

 _Mikasa Ackerman._ Hange did not know much about her, only that she was responsible for the heavier damages their soldiers had attained during yesterday's mission. They described her skills to par that of the captain's despite the lack of proper training.

But Levi was the same, he didn't go through the same training most soldiers did and yet he ended up with the title of humanity's strongest soldier.

Hange couldn't help the uneasiness she felt at that moment, it wasn't hard to admit that the girl made her feel nervous at the impending combat. Hange was no weakling, her years of discipline helping her improve on her skills that now bested most of their men, and while she has been able to match Levi's energy from time to time, she also had more than her fair share of losses against him. Levi was relentless as a sparring partner but she took every chance to train with him as he challenged her and inevitably polished her skills - using not only strength but her mind to win against him.

The opportunity to spar with Mikasa made her feel the same uneasiness she felt when training with Levi. But this was her own personal gamble, Erwin was clearly rubbing off on her. Every fight was a gamble - she put her authority on the line and that was a strong enough resolve for her to keep fighting for as long as she could.

After setting her glasses down on the grass, now putting on her goggles properly. They took their positions across from each other, Mikasa clearly in an offensive stance and prepared to tackle her from the get go. 

The fight began and Mikasa's clear determination to beat Hange had initially overwhelmed her, opting to block every punch and kick thrown her way. Mikasa was just as relentless as Levi, and that played to Hange's favour. It simply meant that Mikasa was readable, the moves were not textbook and if it were anyone else, she would've clearly beat them a few minutes into the battle. Unfortunately for Mikasa, Hange has spent too many hours being Levi's punching doll.

Mikasa's movements faltered for only a second but Hange took that opportunity to switch from her defensive stance to offense, Hange began her own vicious streak as she struck Mikasa with sharp precision and intense force.

 _How do you beat Captain Levi?_ it was something that Hange pondered on like she would with her experiments. To everyone, Levi was a big fucking wall that was seemingly impossible to climb over. but Hange refused to bow to that premise, he was no titan and they've found ways to beat even those creatures. There was surely something that could be done, some kind of motive that could be exploited to Hange's favour.

The answer was easy if one were to take a step back. Literally and Figuratively.

Take calculated steps back, allow opponents like Mikasa to indulge in their strength - let it consume them until all fleeting thoughts are overwhelmed. and when they get to that pinnacle of intense excursion, a glimmering second of opportunity presents itself. Hange swung a controlled fist at her and when Mikasa hurriedly dodged it, she followed up with her dominant hand connecting with the girl's ribs with vehement force. From that point on, Hange had gained the upper hand in what was once seen as a losing battle. She did not falter in her attacks, a sound harmony of punches and kicks orchestrated with such precision that Mikasa could simply not follow. Hange spun, extending her leg and knocking the wind out of Mikasa as she fell to the floor. Hange wasted no time and got on top of her, rendering the powerful cadet incapacitated beneath her.

Try as she did, Mikasa could not break free from Hange's intense hold on her. Something that she attained from endless encounters with Levi - in this moment, she knew that all the times she ended up with bruised ribs or a cut lip and cheek was worth it. She had shown now more than ever that she was a capable _and_ intense leader. She showed reason why she was worthy of her position.

"This is the part where I ask you do you yield." Hange informs.

The black-haired girl glares at her from below, before heaving out a sigh. "I yield."

In an instant, Hange got off of her and extended a hand to help her stand. Mikasa begrudgingly took it, still a little sour from her defeat.

"Do you wanna know why you lost?" Hange asked her.

Mikasa all but glared, clenching her fists as if she was gonna swing at Hange again. "Because I was weak."

Hange shook her head, "From when we started I'm pretty sure you thought otherwise."

"Well then I don't know, sir." Her response laced with venom.

"Because you saw your opponent as weaker." Hange stated as a matter-of-fact. The insult to herself something she easily brushed off. It wasn't a lie anyway, Hange was weaker than Mikasa.

"Your confidence was your downfall." Ymir spoke up, using the words Hange had also told her.

Hange nodded in agreement, "Because you thought me to be weaker, you became complacent in the favoured outcome that you'd win."

"So you're saying I didn't give my all?" Mikasa interrogates with a clenched jaw, her annoyance seeping with every passing second.

Hange smirks at her, the mischief coming across her features, "I don't know, did I?"

Just as Mikasa was about to speak up again, Moblit came running in their direction screaming 'section commander' while he was at it. Hange turned to anticipate her assistant, He used his knees to support him as he spent a few seconds catching his breathe. "The Commander has requested for your presence after today's gathering." He informed.

Like a lightbulb had lit up above her head, Hange clapped her hands together, once again turning to face the group. "Ah! I forgot to tell you, you're going to be introduced to the rest of the cadets at today's gathering!"

Puzzled faces stared back at her but with Moblit's sudden intrusion, Hange could only assume it was nearing gathering time.

"Moblit how much time left before the gathering?"

He takes out the pocket watch which Hange entrusted to him from his coat's chest pocket, reading the time, "45 minutes at most, section commander."

Hange nods her head in acknowledgement, "It's settled then! The 5 of you head back to your quarters and go freshen up. Relax if you so dearly have the time. I expect to reconvene with you all in half an hour, understood?"

Ymir, Sasha, and Krista immediately nod their heads at her in acknowledgement. Mikasa eyed her for a few more seconds before eventually nodding in acknowledgement as well, Annie having seen Mikasa nod turned her head to look at the section commander as well and gave the faintest of nods. Progress.

The group headed back inside to do as Hange had instructed them to while Hange went to retrieve her glasses from the patches of grass, fixing her goggles on her forehead to accommodate her glasses.

"Did he mentioned what he wanted to talk to me about?" Hange asks Moblit.

He shakes his head though Hange could not see it, "He didn't, section commander. Probably something out of my rank."

Hange sighs heavily, plopping back down on the grass that tickled her neck. Hange had a bad feeling about this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In canon, Mikasa is obviouslyyyy stronger than Hange BUT have you ever stopped to think about the possibility of them besting their regiment's top two?
> 
> Also, I'd just like to mention that yes this fanfic really uses she/he/they pronouns for Hange and while some may be offended by it (which I will deeply apologize for more and more) I feel it to be necessary to the story? I mean Isayama had requested an equal use of she/he right but in this case, with the issue Hange faces I just feel it necessary to use an abundance when referring to them if that makes sense? I'll try my best to show this more in future chapters!
> 
> Hope you liked this chapter. Let me know your thoughts. :)


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you miss Isabel Black, comment "My Lady" to summon an aggravated lady.

The gathering proceeded fairly well. As Hange and the others expected, none of the lower ranking soldiers questioned the presence of the female cadets further, their trust in the commander and higher ups exceeding their need to challenge command.

As soon as Erwin dismissed the cadets, some of the recruits who Hange recognized to be from the 104th training corps approached Mikasa and the others - presumably bonding over the fact that they were all fairly new to the scene.

Hange followed begrudgingly behind Erwin as they made their way to his office as he had requested her presence. Upon entering the room, Erwin immediately sought his chair and relaxingly sat down. Unsure how to proceed, Hange stood idly by awaiting for his next orders.

"Hange, you can relax. please take a seat." He extends his arm in the direction of the chair that was placed across his desk.

"Sorry. It's just that having no idea what you wanted to discuss has had me on edge as of late."

Erwin smiles apologetically, "I'm sorry for causing you such distress. Though I should say that I come to you both as a comrade _and_ a friend."

Hange eyed Erwin, clearly intrigued with where this conversation would go.

Erwin leaned forward, his elbows resting atop the arms of the chair as per his usual stance, "Do you remember when we talked about attending a gathering?"

"Are you pertaining to the ball you attended last night?" Erwin nodded.

Hange also nodded in acknowledgement, "You went to socialise though I would say that's just your sugarcoated reasoning. You wanted to endorse the scouts, did you not?"

Gaining the hint from Erwin earlier that they were conversing as both comrades and friends helped Hange's manner of talking to take on a more casual tone. Erwin chuckled, amused that Hange had been spot on as he expected. "Indeed. I went with the goal of improving our regiment's reputation." Erwin took out an envelope which Hange mentally took note of, along with a bottle that she internally cursed.

Erwin was fond of his liquor, the damned liquid helping ease the tension he felt at the worst of times. Often, the three of them would share a drink while discussing future missions or negotiations. It never interfered with their judgement but Hange would be lying if she said that the liquor didn't put her in a hazed state after a few sips.

The blonde retrieved two glasses from the shelf adjacent to his desk, pouring them both a generous amount of the drink.

He took a sip of his own, humming in delight before he continued on with their conversation, "Will you not ask me how I was able to accomplish my objective?"

Hange took a sip from her own glass, flinching a little at the intensity of the drink as it entered her system, "Whether I bother to ask or not, you will tell me anyway."

He could only laugh in response to his friend's statement, clearly enjoying their conversation. "We have Isabel Black to thank." He simply replied.

Hange was halfway into drinking when he replied, making her stop her movement for a fleeting second before she resumed, hoping that Erwin did not notice her body language - he did.

"How so?" She probed with a mask of indifference.

"I danced with her."

"Dancing with Isabel Black was enough for you to deem your objective reached?"

"Surely you have not forgotten the influence her family has?"

Hange shook her head, "I'm well aware of the Black family, Alistair Black has been more than generous to us after all."

Erwin raised his glass in agreement, they both took a sip of their drinks, "What would the people think should the daughter of Alistair Black who is known to sparsely offer her hand for a dance be seen escorted by a commander on the dance floor?"

"Surely it would pique the interest of the people. To gain the favour of who is deemed to be the diamond of the first water is a privilege in itself." Hange confirmed his thoughts with words of her own. Erwin nods, opting for a wordless conversation which Hange understood.

In dancing with Isabel, Erwin has gained the upper hand. Now the people will do as they do and talk of the ball's events - of the man who swept the lady off of her feet. How righteous and special he must be to gain the regard of the lady. Sooner or later, word will go out and his identity shall be made known.

Erwin Smith, Commander of the Scouts Regiment. Just like that, he and his regiment will gain much needed favour from the people, hopefully helping aid them in their continued fight.

It was a clever idea that Hange entirely acknowledged. but she could not help but think about that night from a year ago, the night that she attended a ball along with Erwin and Levi. How she had stood in the shadows and as fate would have it, be seen by none other than Isabel Black, gaining her regard as well. Hange also had the same fortune of dancing with the beautiful lady. Had things played out differently, she would be the one in his position - the people would've known of a section commander who danced with the daughter from the noble house of Black, they would've taken interest in Hange and Isabel's meeting out in the district that one time. If things were different, the people would've watched attentively to the affections Hange and Isabel had limitedly shared with each other.

But this was the reality, she had chosen to remain in the shadows, she had chosen to stay away from the light - which in the end was not bad as it protected her secret. But now, she had to stand idly by while the people discussed of a tandem between the survey corps' commander and the lady. She could do nothing but watch painfully as it played out in front of her - a life that could've been hers if she willed it.

The alcohol must've taken its effect as Hange could not stop the words from slipping out of her mouth, "I danced with her before you did."

She flinched as soon it came out, she had put her mask down for a split second and had already managed to act or speak foolishly. Erwin looked at her inquisitively, "You have?"

There was no point in avoiding the conversation, Erwin had clearly taken interest and she knew that he would continue to prod until he got answers. She nodded her head, "A year ago. At the ball they hosted."

Erwin hummed, remembering how he had persuaded his friend to come along for the night though not expecting such a revelation a year later.

"I did not see you on the floor."

"That is because we did not dance there."

 _Oh?_ Erwin's eyebrows raised intrigued, "Dare I ask where did you dance then?"

"You gave me an order - to stay clear and away from the limelight. I did as you asked, Erwin." she stated, defending her actions first before giving him the answers he sought after, "The lady invited me to dance and I declined, I told her of what was expected of me but she was insistent, thus we danced out on the balcony away from peering eyes."

"I guess we have more things in common now."

Hange could not help the pang she felt in her chest at his words. She could not blame Erwin for becoming enchanted with the lady, she had befallen the same fate after one night so she could not be one to talk. Noticing Hange's internal apprehension, he laughed before finishing his glass.

"I do believe I don't mean it in the way you are thinking," Hange raises her eyes to meet his. "I have my own... _interest._ " He answers, his words giving Hange an obscure hint of what or _who_ it may be but she decided against pressing further. There were more important matters to be discussed right now besides Erwin's interest.

"We have talked as friends. I feel it necessary to now ask what you need from me as a soldier."

"Always straight to business with you, Section Commander." Erwin lightly joked which made Hange laugh.

"I apologise, Commander."

"Well," He initiates, picking up the letter that lay on his desk. "Alistair Black has done us many favours, Isabel Black now included in that debt. I do believe it's time we repay at least one of them."

He offers the sealed envelope to Hange which she eyed curiously, "What is this?"

"An invitation."

"To who?"

"Isabel Black. A simple request of her presence for a meeting."

Hange raised his eyebrows, "And may I ask whatever for?"

Erwin nodded his head, "The lady not only allowed me the fortune of dancing with her, she also allowed me access to her thoughts, _particularly of her interest in joining the military should the circumstances have been different._ "

 _Ah._ This was the uneasy feeling that Hange had been feeling from the moment Moblit informed her of Erwin's request for her presence. _This_ was the gamble.

The uneasiness simmered intensely in her stomach but she persisted with her air of indifference, "You have a gamble in mind." Erwin nodded in confirmation.

"Don't you think it too soon? You just amused yourself with one not even two days ago."

"You and Levi have said the same thing."

Hange was surprised upon being given the knowledge that Levi had already been informed of this gamble. He had not hinted at it earlier during the ceremony.

"I will tell you what I told him: If not now then when? but moreover, would you not like to ask me what this gamble is about?"

Hange leaned back on her own chair, raising her glass to her lips, eyes never turning away from Erwin even as she gulped the revolting drink down her throat.

He chuckled at her behaviour, "I think it time we welcomed women in our ranks."

Hange coughed, not expecting his words. "Erwin-" He cut her off.

"Please do not try to convince me otherwise as your existence and valuable presence in our ranks is enough reason to take this gamble on."

Hange sighed in resignation as his words held truth. She couldn't argue otherwise as she deemed it hypocritical of her.

"I intend on revealing the true purpose of the female squad soon. But even with the favour we will gain thanks to Lady Isabel's actions, it will still not be enough for the people to easily accept a group deemed to be law offenders joining the military. They will not trust these misfits."

There it was again, the wave of uneasiness. She felt nauseous all of a sudden yet she knew with clarity that it was not due to the alcohol that now took effect in her system. His words conveyed enough hints that she understood his line of thought, something she so dearly wished she didn't have the ability to do at times. Alas, she was considered the brain of the trio for obvious reasons.

Erwin allowed her time to compose herself before he continued, "At the right moment, we must be prepared to reveal the identity of a female authority who has been in the survey corps long before we welcomed the female squad. Someone the people trusted without even knowing her truth, _because she is a capable person_ thus the rest should not matter."

He was about to bargain her life, prepared to exploit her truth should it be necessary. Tension was high despite the wave of euphoria the liquor offered. The truth she had delicately protected, allowing herself to be consumed by the burden of the lie she lived with, accepting every directive to linger in secret; what was the purpose of all that if in the end, he was going to give her up and open her for the people's judgement? She suddenly became a pawn in his game.

She could not say with full certainty that she trusted Erwin with this gamble, could not bring herself to even mutter that she trusted him with her life. It was no longer metaphorical, he now literally held her fate - her life in his hands. How it would play out, she had no idea of knowing, and that uncertainty terrified her. There were limited things that Hange did not know but the anonymity of this gamble made her stomach churn, her morals becoming a whirlwind of doubts.

"Hange." Erwin called out, she met his eyes. Despite the provocation she gave herself to remain stern and formal with her eyes, the fear had overtaken it and Erwin saw the distrust and fear that was displayed.

"I have no intentions of feeding you to the wolves no matter the outcome. This is _my_ gamble, and I will accept all repercussions of my decisions as such."

She calmed down a little at his comforting words, giving a nod of appreciation though the doubts still lingered.

"I suppose you would like me to send this invitation to the lady?" She asked changing the topic.

"Preferably as soon as possible."

Hange nodded and immediately stood from her chair. "Well then, permission to leave, Commander. I do believe I must make necessary arrangements so this invitation gets to the lady soon."

"Dismissed." Hange nods grateful that she was now allowed to leave. Just as she held the door's handle, Erwin called out to her, making her stop in her actions.

"Please know that I have no intention of putting you in harm if it can be avoided."

Hange turns to him, offering him a strained smile, "We are scouts. We are always in harm, Erwin. You do not need to try to comfort me."

"You are my friend, Hange."

"And you are my commander. I do not have the authority to interfere with whatever you decide is for the best."

He was surprised by Hange's words, a new wave of guilt hitting him but he easily subdued it. He was hurt, there was a profound disappointment in knowing that he was willing to sacrifice his friend when they had already sacrificed so much. He knew her words to be true; As Commander, he was always making decisions that was immoral to many but understood by a few - he sacrificed hundreds of lives of his men in order to preserve and protect the lives of thousands. He was always sacrificing people, and yet this one was too personal that it felt like a grave sin.

"May I leave now, Erwin?" Hange asks, bringing him out of his thoughts. He nods in response.

As soon as Hange left Erwin's room, making sure to close the door behind her. She trudged towards her own office, ignoring the salutes of the soldiers she passed by. They all noticed the section commander's aggravated state and dared not to intervene in fear that they would be faced with the more horrifying side of them.

Once in the privacy of her office, Hange locked the door and slid down the floor, cradling her face in her hands.

"Why is the universe being so cruel?" she asked to no one in particular.

The weight Hange felt on her shoulders was painful to bear, her lungs feeling exhausted and in desperate need of air as she felt like her body was being crushed in that moment. The panic and uneasiness she had tamed awhile ago now hurling and attacking her with such intensity that she could do nothing but allow for the assault to happen.

Hange was so tired... of the lies, the deceit, the life she lived. She had accepted long ago that her fate was to live like this as long as it meant she could protect the people she cared about, but now that the burden was heavier and her life was about to be at the the center of a power play, she had no idea how to take all this information in.

Tears brimmed in her eyes, blurring her vision. Hange clutched her shirt in her fist, the piece of clothing suddenly feeling too tight on her skin but it did nothing to alleviate her quickened breathing.

She was losing her composure quickly, her vision blurring not only because of the tears but also the lack of oxygen entering her system - she was on the brink of fainting. _You're pathetic._ She screamed at herself internally.

Just as she closed her eyes and allowed her body to lie on the floor, there was a knock on the door.

"Hey boss. You okay? I heard some fools gossiping that you were in a bad mood."

_Ymir._

As much as she wanted to verbally tell the girl to leave her be, she could not muster up enough strength to do so. She was already having a hard enough time trying to stay conscious.

"Boss?" Ymir called out once again.

A minute passed by without a word from the section commander and Ymir was considering just turning around to leave, surmising that maybe the section commander wasn't even in their office to begin with.

Ymir sighed, her thoughts torn, "It won't hurt to be sure." She took the hairpin out of her hair, prepared to pick the lock. She checked the halls to make sure that nobody was there, it was not good to be seen picking the lock of a higher up's office after all. She heard the familiar click as she successfully unlocked the door, holding the handle. She spoke up once more before turning the handle.

"Boss, if you're naked right now I swear I won't tell anyone. I'll deal with your punishment later."

With that, Ymir pushed the door open and her eyes immediately widened with the sight presented to her.

The section commander's tear stricken face while she weakly lay on the wooden floor, barely hanging onto consciousness. "Hey!" Ymir screamed in panic, scrambling on the floor to reach Hange, she held her superior's hand in hers. "Boss, you okay?" Ymir squeezed the hand she was holding, hoping that it would bring the section commander back to her senses even a little.

Hange's eyes connected with hers, though there was no look of recognition. The section commander was dazed, clearly unaware of her surroundings at the moment.

Ymir wrapped her other arm around Hange, putting them in a sitting position all the while her eyes remained on Hange. She put the hand that she was tightly holding onto on her own chest, the beating of Ymir's heart along with the rise and fall of chest brought Hange back to a more sane state despite her uneven breathing.

"You're okay, boss. Just breathe with me." Ymir pleads, inhaling and exhaling with her mouth to make Hange follow.

Hange followed her actions diligently, slowly but surely regaining her composure. Ymir was pleased with the progress and pulled their hand away from her chest but still using her other arm to support Hange in sitting. As she moved the hand away, Ymir was caught off guard when Hange started to lean into her. Their head relaxing on Ymir's shoulder, she stiffly sat, not knowing what to do at the moment.

"I'm so tired of the lies..." Hange whispers, not recognising at the moment the words she'd spoken.

A surge of pity and sympathy washed across Ymir, knowing a thing or two what it's like to live with lies. The arm that had been wrapped around the section commander, comfortingly rubbed across their back as Ymir whispered back, "I know, Boss. I know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These past few eps of season 4 has been so emotionally taxing and I don't think I can bear to see Hange struggle more. They've been through so much that I just wanna give them a hug.
> 
> Anyone else getting tired of Erwin and his gambles? lol I know this is another chapter without our dear Isabel but I promise you!! she's coming back real soon. <3
> 
> I don’t know how I feel about this chapter so I might rewrite it in the future, I’ll make sure to note it in the future chapters if that happens!


	15. Chapter 15

"Ymir, I'm fine. You have no reason to worry about my well-being, besides Moblit does that plenty enough."

After the short outburst Hange had in her office which she was highly aware was a panic attack, she had apologized profusely to Ymir for her ill-conduct which the cadet had shrugged off before proceeding to hover over the section commander. Ymir did not leave her side at any point, following behind her as she met Moblit out on the grounds to inform him that she would be out for a few hours at most - had she not informed him, she would have to apologize to him at length upon her return for worrying him immensely.

Ymir stood a distance away when Hange bumped into Levi in the hallway, requesting to have a brief conversation with him which the man indulged.

_"You knew about it." Hange accused, leaving no room for denial. The way it was worded was vague but years of working together; arguing mission plan after another, comforting each other through every post-expedition, sharing thoughtful conversations had allowed for a telepathic level of connection between the two._

_Levi nodded his head in confirmation. A flash of disappointment crossed Hange's features, barely bothering to cover it up – With Levi, Hange allowed a show of vulnerability that not many have seen, what with how dysfunctionally harmonious their friendship had become._

_"Why didn't you tell me?"_

_Levi looked away, a tell that he was feeling guilty. He muttered under his breath, "It wasn't mine to tell."_

_Bullshit. Hange knew the moment the words left his lips that it was complete bullshit. Hange fixed Levi with a hard stare, the one that warned him that she wouldn't let this conversation go until she got the truth._

_Levi sighed in defeat, "I didn't want to be the bearer of bad news. I didn't want the news to even reach you." He admitted._

_"Why? You knew at some point Erwin would've told me."_

_He let out a defensive 'tch' before turning his gaze back to his friend, "Because I was holding on to the hope that I could still change his mind."_

_Hange's eyes widened at his admission, not entirely expecting that answer thus not knowing how to assess it to be truth or a lie, but the way Levi stared back at her, eyes just as fixed and vulnerable as hers told her everything she needed to know. He was telling the truth, and it was one that warmed Hange's heart._

_Her gaze softened, taking on an appreciative aura, "Thank you, Levi."_

_"Don't thank me, I didn't do anything. Since Erwin has told you his idiotic gamble, there's no way I can go and ask him to reconsider. This is set in stone."_

_At that moment, Hange understood what emotions were going through the captain despite his blank exterior. Like said, years of friendship have allowed for them to connect past the exterior defenses they had built. Levi felt guilty; like he was useless and had failed to protect someone he cared about. He felt weak, and that was something that the man detested more than anything else._

_"You cared enough to plan on trying. That is more than what I deserve, Levi."_

_"You value yourself so poorly, Four eyes. It is **barely** what you deserve, not only from me but from everyone in this regiment."_

_Not feeling the need to continue the conversation especially with the sealed envelope that was tucked in the inside pocket of her coat, making her feel uneasy with its presence. They bid each other farewell, Levi telling her to not be stupid while outside which garnered a laugh from the section commander._

Once the minor arrangements had been said and done, Hange retrieved Nova and Levi's horse (without his approval despite having a conversation with him earlier).

"Be nice to this one, He's Levi's." Hange informed, giving Ymir the reigns to Levi's horse. Ymir eyed the animal warily, unsure what to do with it. Hange noticed her reluctance.

"What's wrong?" Hange asked, hopping onto her own horse.

Ymir rubbed the back of her neck in embarrassment, "I don't know how to ride a horse..." she quietly confessed.

Hange was taken by surprise at her admission. She had presumed that Ymir would know the basics of riding a horse since she and her friends had found a way to understand the fundamentals of ODM Gear which was much more complicated in nature.

"You've been keen on not letting me leave your sight. Surely you would've expected that I'd be riding a horse to settle my errands?" Hange said in amusement, a faint smirk appearing on her lips.

"I thought your errands were to be done here, in the base. Geez, boss..." Ymir chides, her remarks not having the usual snark that Hange had appreciated from the cadet.

Hange laughed heartily at the cadet's state and scooted forward on her own horse, "Lead that one back to its stable then get on behind me. Surely you're capable of getting on a horse?" Hange said the latter part with a hint of teasing.

Ymir rolled her eyes, following the section commander's orders and directing the horse back to its assigned stable before eyeing Nova cautiously, "If your horse kills me then that's on your conscience, boss."

Hange rolls her eyes playfully, reaching out a hand to assist Ymir, "You're so dramatic at the best of times." She gladly took the offer, successfully getting on Nova albeit clumsily.

The section commander directed Nova to a wider clearing then squeezed the horse's body enough to get it to speed up, Hange felt Ymir instinctively tighten her hold around her waist but paid it no attention or malice - she ought to do it so as to not fall off after all.

With the wind breezing past them, Hange focused on the path that would lead them to Mitras district where the House of Black was located in a while.

"Next training is going to be dedicated to teaching you lot how to ride a horse." Hange announced, her words getting muffled by the breeze but coherent enough to Ymir who was in close distance.

When Ymir hummed in acknowledgement, Hange decided to add, "No matter how well you play in the air, it'll mean nothing if you have no idea how to get on a horse without looking like a fool."

Ymir gasped then lightly punched Hange's arm, _"Asshole."_

"You realize I'm your superior, right? That warrants a punishment, cadet." Hange says sternly, though because Ymir couldn't see her face, she didn't see the playful smirk on Hange's lips. She was simply messing with the girl.

"Sorry, section commander." Ymir said and Hange instantly started laughing obnoxiously.

The rest of the ride was spent with the two laughing, Ymir quite pleased that gone was the demeanour of the section commander she had unfortunately seen earlier.

Something in the fragile state and words Hange said had affected Ymir. She could not help but feel for the section commander, especially with the admission that they were living with lies - lies that Ymir did not know but deemed to not be her business. If the section commander had been that distraught over their burden then she knew it was not her place to feel entitled to be made aware. She was simply a cadet and without the scouts' mercy — particularly the section commander’s willingness to take their group in, they would be in worse circumstances.

They reached the Black Manor after a while, Ymir's face showing her utter awe at the exquisite structure of the residence. Unlike before, Hange had gone through the front entrance, informing the staff that they had a letter addressed to Lady Isabel Black. Once the section commander's identity had been acknowledged, Hange directed Nova towards the front of the house where a garden with a fountain in the middle was situated.

"Hop off." Hange ordered Ymir which she immediately obliged with.

Still holding on to Nova's reigns, Hange hopped off as well, handing the holds to Ymir. "Your current situation's very complicated and we don't want to do anything to upset the commander." Ymir nodded in agreement.

"Stay here while I sort this out. Do not let go of Nova." Ymir saluted to the section commander, Nova's reigns tightly held in her right hand. "Yes, section commander!"

Hange nodded, switching to her section commander persona before turning around and walking into the manor.

As she entered the manor, memories of that night flooded Hange's mind. These were the very walls that had sparked a change in her, a craving for something beyond what she grown accustomed to. A desire to step out of the shadows.

Shaking those thoughts away, Hange stood upright, awaiting the presence of the lady that they had become so fond of. 

"Section Commander Zoe," A familiar voice came from a distance away. Hange turned her attention to the stairs where a breathtaking view of the lady, Isabel Black, was kindly presented to her. Isabel's hair leaned on the wavy side today, tied in a half-bun with a ribbon in the colour that matched her dress — a dainty yellow floral dress that ended just above her ankles. She looked beautiful.

Hange could not bring herself to greet the lady, far too distracted by her presence. Isabel was confused at the lack of a response - raising an eyebrow at the section commander who just continued to look at her with a blank expression. "Section Commander?" Isabel called out.

Hange winced, cursing herself for spacing out at this particular moment. She lightly shook her head to bring back her senses and cleared her throat, "Lady Isabel." Hange greeted with a salute.

"I have a letter for you from the commander of the scouts regiment." Hange informed.

Isabel perked up in curiosity, "What for?"

"I believe it best that you read for yourself, Miss."

Isabel inched closer to the section commander, making Hange stiffen and hold her breath. The lady eyed him suspiciously, retrieving the sealed envelope from his grasp, their finger touching for a little, making Hange wince and immediately retract her hand which Isabel clearly took note of but did not mention. "Are you alright, section commander?" She inquires, already opening the letter and reading its content.

_... I'd be greatly honoured to have your presence for a meeting in our headquarters should you accept this invitation. I hope to have a favourable discussion with you._

_13th commander of the Survey Corps,_

_E. Smith_

Isabel could not hide her surprise nor intrigue at the content of the letter. A meeting with the commander. Sure they had a wonderful night and Isabel felt she owed a debt to Erwin for taking her away from Lord Maxwell. She had spent most of today cooed up in their personal library and it was beginning to bore her to no end, she had mindlessly pleaded the sky to make her day a bit more interesting and not even a few minutes later, Daisy came into the library announcing the presence of a section commander.

Isabel would be lying if she said that her heart didn't quicken its pace at the mention of the section commander, she'd certainly be lying that despite her conviction to now guard her heart better especially where the section commander was concerned - she was still badly drawn to his existence. Her hands were clammy and her walking pace rushed as she checked her appearance in the mirror before taking a deep breath and trudging towards the main hall where Daisy informed her the section commander was waiting.

At the sight of section commander Zoë, Isabel's resolve grew weaker. She had not seen him since their unplanned meeting in the forest - the night he had literally swept her off her feet. It seemed that people have had a consistent pattern of sweeping her off her feet lately. She shook the thoughts away, willing herself to remain formal, putting up the trained act that her mother had deeply embedded in her since she was a child.

She had an intuition that his visit was professional rather than personal, otherwise he'd have used the back entrance instead of announcing his presence to their security staff. With that in mind, Isabel opted to return the professionalism.

"I'm quite alright, Missus. _It's just that I admittedly got distracted by you._ " Hange admitted to her previous inquiry.

Her breath hitched in her throat, that formality she internally fought to put up crumbling once again. _Don't._ She warned herself.

Isabel turned her eyes upward to look at the section commander. His hair was more unkept than usual, strands flying in different directions.

"Does that really work on the ladies you talk to?" The words left Isabel's lips before she could restrain herself. She mentally winced at the display of emotion - what she knew looked an awful lot like jealousy like Astoria had previously mentioned.

Hange's eyes widened at the venomous reply, unsure what the lady meant. "I beg your pardon, Miss?"

Isabel waved her off, "I apologise. I spoke out of step. Anyway, I hope you don't mind waiting a while, I'd like to change to more comfortable clothing before we set off for HQ." Hange simply nodded before saluting and turning to exit the main hall.

Isabel watched as he walked away, her heart sinking at the sight. She continued to reprimand herself for how she felt. It was no sin to feel such emotions, but she felt it wrong to have it come so easily - the few years of denying and playing hard to get with suitors not matching how she acted with the section commander.

Hange walked back outside, meeting up with Ymir who seemed much friendlier with Nova now. "Had a good conversation you two?" She spoke up, surprising Ymir.

Ymir rolled her eyes playfully now that a more mischievous Hange stood in front of her, "Yeah. He told me all about how you looked like a fool the first time you hopped on him too."

They both laughed at the teasing and continued to pass teasing remarks, they didn't realize that a certain lady had already come, holding her own horse.

Isabel's heart stung at the sight of the section commander sharing a laugh with a girl. Was this the woman the captain had been referring to? Was this who Hange-

She brushed the thoughts away. _"It is not my place to know or care."_ She reasoned with herself.

She decided to make her presence known, "All ready, Section Commander?" She spoke up, making sure that her tone kept away any kind of personal attachment and only voiced a professional tone.

Hange saluted to her once more, the girl following behind her. "Ah yes, Lady Black." He responded.

He called her _Lady Black,_ for reasons unknown it irked Isabel.

"Missus, this is Ymir, she's..." His words faded, unsure how to present the company.

The girl named Ymir spoke up, flashing Isabel a faint smile, "a massive headache to the section commander as of late." she responded.

Hange glared at Ymir but the lady seemed unfazed and just shrugged at him.

 _Control yourself._ Isabel warned. She was determined to not be affected by the two. What their relationship was is beyond her, not her business.

She may have shared a wonderful ball with the section commander, She may have thought of him more often than she cared to admit, They may have spent a fateful meeting enjoying the moon light, They may have shared kisses on the cheek. But that didn't change the truth that what they were to each other - was an ambiguous mess of unclear emotions and intentions. That was the ugly truth, they stood nowhere personal in each other's lives, their affections were unlabelled. It was a dreamy moment to live in, but everyone has to wake up from it at some point.

And this sight in front of her, with the section commander sharing a comfortable laugh with the girl, painfully reminded her that it was now time to wake up. No matter how much she didn't want to, It was what was needed to be done. She needed to cut the string of affection she felt while she could still properly guard her heart from future hurt.

Isabel noticed that they only had one horse, "Where's your other horse?" She inquired.

"Oh. The regiment could not give us a spare today." Hange reasoned out, not wanting to disclose Ymir's lack of skill in riding a horse.

"Well we do. Would you like me to ask someone to fetch one?" She offered.

The girl looked to the section commander with uneasy eyes, a silent plead for something Isabel did not understand.

Hange knew exactly what it meant, she turned to the lady in front of her who seemed to be more closed off today though she did not comment on it, "That's quite generous of you, Missus. But we'll decline the offer, I believe _this one,_ " He refers to Ymir with a gentle push to the side, a playful smile on his lips, "Would much prefer to ride with me."

Isabel nodded, not wanting to know more of the reasons behind it. She had already convinced herself of a reasoning that was personal in nature and having the section commander confirm it would only hurt her. She was no masochist.

They all hopped on their respective horses, Isabel watching through her peripheral how Hange offered a hand to assist Ymir get on the horse. The girl almost fell off, making Hange laugh.

The three rode back to HQ, Isabel focusing her attention on the path, smiling at the few merchants who recognized her. But that didn't stop her from noticing the pair who rode to her side; they shared laughs, Ymir tightening her hold around his waist ever so often, the jabs. It was hell to watch them and as much as she told herself not to look, she couldn't help but do so. She felt an uncomfortable feeling in the pit of her stomach, an emotion she continued to deny - jealousy. She knew she shouldn't watch, she knew better than to fuel her own emotion, but she thought in a twisted way that maybe indulging it would make it easier for her to end it sooner. That some sense would get knocked into her from watching them, so she continued on, allowing herself to bask in the pain of the sight of the two people who were blissfully unaware of her stares.

They reached HQ in no time, Hange ordered Ymir to take the two horses to the stables which she easily obliged with. Now Isabel was left alone with the section commander, there was a distance between them as they entered the halls, Isabel consciously creating space between the two of them.

They walked slowly which Isabel appreciated as she took in the sight of the stone walls, the unlit torches hanging on it, the thoroughly cleaned windows and floors.

"So this is the infamous Survey Corps headquarters." she remarked in her head. It was nothing like the house that she grew up in but it was a welcomed view nonetheless. Something about the rough edges and lack of details interesting her in life within these walls.

"Lady Isabel, are you alright?" A voice brought her out of her own world.

Isabel turned to the section commander who was eyeing her with a faint look of concern. She gave him a trained smile, continuing her sight seeing of the place. "I'm perfectly well. Why do you ask, section commander?"

"You've been quite aloof today, not to mention you barely spoke on our travel here, and well... _this._ " Hange motions to the space between them.

Isabel consciously raises her defenses once again, not giving away what she felt. "I don't think Lady Ymir would appreciate me invading your personal space." She comments off-handedly, confusing Hange even more.

"Ymir? Why would Ymir be bothered by it?" Hange asks, though she was speaking more to herself than to Isabel. She rubs her chin thoughtfully with her fingers, eyebrows scrunching up together.

A number of reasons came to Hange's mind but she dismissed every single one when she found a fault to her reasoning. Then in an instant, just as they rounded the corner to Erwin's office, a lightbulb lit up - an explanation coming to her instantly. "Lady Isabel, are you-"

She got cut off when the door to Erwin's office and out came out the commander who had heard their footsteps and decided to meet them in advance.

"Lady Isabel. Section Commander." The commander greeted.

Isabel was pleased with the intrusion and her smile grew in relief, the trained one fading in exchange for one that showed relief. In Hange's eyes however, it seemed as though the lady was excited due to the appearance of Erwin, and that caused a stinging pain in her chest which she kept to herself. She smiled at the sight of the elated lady, her look of affection not lost on the commander who had a clear view of the two.

She dismissed her earlier reasoning, _there's no way she could've been jealous... not when she looks this happy to see Erwin..._

Hange accepted the defeat with ease. She made amends that Isabel Black now held some sort of affection for her friend, and while she was eased by the knowledge that Erwin's interest were elsewhere, she could not stop the jealousy or pain that she felt in her chest - tightening with every second she spent looking at her.

"Well then... I shall take my leave now, Lady Isabel." Hange alerts in her section commander persona. The air of indifference and professionalism surrounding her exterior and tone. She gave a salute to the lady then to Erwin who acknowledged her.

With regret, Hange stopped in her walk, watching as Isabel now stood beside Erwin.

They looked good together. She had no doubt that people would give them the attention that Erwin planned and wanted. She entertained the idea that with their act - should the lady agree to it - affection shall develop between the two, and she could do nothing but watch as it played out.

Erwin's good for her. He's respected, noble, virtuous, caring, sadistic when it fancies him, but he's good. He'll protect her, and that gave Hange comfort.

Hange already had a number of people she was protecting - her own life and burden included. She had no qualms in giving Erwin the responsibility of protecting Isabel Black because honestly? She had no more room in her burdens to shoulder another person's life, especially someone she was so desperately drawn to, someone who made her desire more than the life she currently had.

Hange turned around and walked away from the two, she was determined to continue moving forward. Because she had no choice, she had to keep moving forward else she be caught in the crossfire, and she was determined to live more days - her determination fuelled by her desire to protect the people she cared about. Isabel Black may be one fine lady that incited a spark to cross boundaries and speak truths in Hange, but she was only one person compared to the many lives she vowed to protect. Being section commander allowed her to revel in the belief that it is better to sacrifice the few to protect the many. 

She moved forward, not looking back. Moving further away from the invisible string that connected her soul to Isabel Black. From the one who brought a danger to her well-kept lie of a life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blame my mess of feelings on the latest chapter of aot.
> 
> I love angst so much and this has always been part of my slow-burn agenda. Let me know your thoughts on this chapter! :)


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ANGST FLUFF TRAIN COMING THROUGHHHHHHH

The trio had arrived at the Scouts HQ just as the sun was setting. Most of the cadets had just finished up their afternoon training so most of them were lying on the grass, watching the sunset and enjoying what sense of peace or normal they could get.

Hange had often found herself watching the younger ones talk and enjoy the scenery, fondly remembering her own time as a young soldier and the many days she and her squad had done the same. They were so naive, so hopeful back then. Yet to understand what exactly they had just signed up for. During the first ever expedition that Hange participated in, she barely came out of it alive. Not because she lacked the skill, but because she took too many people's burdens on her shoulder. As the then-commander had yelled for retreat, Hange continued to fight - to save even just one member of her squad that was at the wrong place at the wrong time.

If it weren't for Erwin who had gone against his squad leader's orders and went back for her, she would've been dead now. She owed Erwin a lot, she owed him her life. And that's why following his every directive came so easily for her as the years passed by, even when she didn't believe in what he wanted to happen, she followed it through.

Now she was regretting getting accustomed to such a practice. 

After she left the commander and lady to their discussion, she decided to look for Moblit who had been taking charge of the afternoon training in her stead.

As Hange walked through the grounds, she noticed that Ymir had reunited with the female cadets. They were a distance away from the bigger group of recruits but they didn't seem to care. They had their own world within their little group and they were content in each other's presence.

She scanned the area for her assistant yet he was nowhere to be found. She assumed that he had gone back inside once the cadets had been dismissed to rejuvenate or freshen himself before dinner.

Feeling quite lost but refusing to go back inside, Hange made the bold decision to join the female squad where they currently sat.

As she approached them; more hostile stares from Mikasa and Annie were sent her way, along with wary ones from Sasha and Krista. The only one who didn't seem too bothered by her presence was Ymir.

"Tired of hanging out with the big shots, boss?" Ymir called out playfully.

Hange shrugged her shoulders, "Just thought I'd take the opportunity to get to know you more."

The wariness of the four other people was enough reason for Hange to make the effort to engage in conversation with them. If they were going to work together on missions, she needed to know them beyond the labels that many had used on them. They were no longer law offenders or thieves, they were soldiers. and Hange had no doubt that they would prove their skills to everyone else soon enough.

She had tried to initiate light conversations such as how they were liking the base, the blandness of the food they had to shove down their throats - which Sasha was most receptive to, screaming her distaste but also looking quite dreamy when she began to talk about the bread and potatoes.

At some point Mikasa and Annie wordlessly left them, having had enough of Hange's pitiful attempt. Soon after, Sasha decided it was time to snoop around for food which Hange warned her that there'd be consequences if she were to steal which seemed to at least tame the girl a bit as she strayed away from the group.

She was now left with Ymir and Krista. The two currently sat side-by-side, Krista leaning ever so slightly into Ymir while they watched the sun go down.

"So Krista..." Hange decided to speak up once more. Krista immediately turned to the section commander with an encouraging smile which Hange appreciated.

"Why'd you agree to join the survey corps?"

It didn't take her long to answer, turning to Ymir, "Because Ymir agreed to it."

"You based your decision on Ymir?" Krista nodded.

"Why?"

Just as Krista's mouth opened to reply to her question, Ymir cut in, "Krista, why don't you go make sure Sasha isn't stealing food."

The two looked at each other in what Hange knew to be a wordless conversation as Krista nodded and stood up, looking down apologetically at the section commander. "It was nice to chat with you even just for a bit, section commander. I hope we get to do it again in the future."

Hange nodded in response, "I hope so too."

The two watched Krista walk away in search for Sasha. "You know I realize I haven’t asked you yet."

Ymir turned to look at the section commander with a confused look, "asked what?"

"Your reason."

Ymir stares at her for a moment before turning her attention back to the moon that had now settled in the sky. "I'm not sure I follow." she replies, stalling the inevitable conversation.

“Why’d you do it? _everything._ steal, hurt people in the process, agree to Erwin’s proposal so easily. What was your reason for it?”

“I think you and I have the same reasons, boss.” Ymir speaks up. Giving a knowing glance to Hange which put the section commander on high alert, her defenses going up just a little bit.

“And what reason is that?”

“We have people we want to protect.”

“And that’s enough to excuse stealing?”

“It doesn’t excuse stealing but it does justify why I agreed with the commander’s proposal.”

Hange nodded in agreement, having accepted Erwin’s proposal under the same pretense during her time. “I assume this person you want to protect means a lot to you?”

The two were clearly on edge and wary of each other at the moment. Not because there was a lack of trust, but because with where the conversation was slowly turning its direction seemed to lead down a path to unravelling each other’s truths.

Ymir didn’t know the section commander’s stance and would rather stay in good relations with them but Hange was cautious for a different reason – Ymir didn’t know. She didn’t have to nor should she. Hange was aware that her recent outburst had already spilled enough information and this path they were treading on would easily allow Ymir the enlightenment of knowing Hange’s secret.

“Yeah. I owe them my life.” Ymir replies, making sure not to give away any hint of who it could be.

Hange’s ears perk up at her statement, “Why do you say that?” She inquires, eyes now directed at the soldier rather than the moon.

A smile spreads across Ymir’s features as she allows herself to be entranced by the view of the moon, bringing back memories of enlightenment. “Because I saw myself in that person - hiding, pretending to be someone I knew deep inside I wasn’t. All to appease other people. _She_ gave me a second chance - to live my life truthfully and without shame. _She_ gave me a reason to live. Because honestly? I’ve grown tired of giving other people the satisfaction of having that much control over my life. This is my biggest fuck you to them.”

The moment Ymir spoke, the more she did and looked upon the moon thankfully. She had let go of previous wariness and allowed only the truth to flow past her lips. It was not lost on Hange that Ymir admitted to this person she cared for to be a woman. It shocked her, not often had she found another person who’s life seemed to eerily mirror hers. But they were still different; Ymir embraced her truth while Hange’s hands were tied by her lies.

Hange could only admire Ymir in that moment, growing in respect at how brave and unapologetic the younger cadet was. She wished so badly she could do the same, but alas, she was nothing more than a coward. Afraid of what the world would do should her truth be made known. She’s considered it, nowadays the thought has found its way into her mind especially with her previous conversation with Erwin clouding her thoughts frequently. She could just do it. Let Erwin confirm the identity of the female superior and see how it plays out, but a part of her was afraid. There were too many people who’d be hit by her deceit; comrades, the merchants she’d gone to for help in building their equipment, _Isabel._

She didn’t mind the inevitable betrayal her comrades would feel should her truth be made known, _but she couldn’t stomach the idea of betraying Isabel like that._

She was so deeply infatuated with the lady, there’s no other way to word it. In the limited moments they shared, Isabel Black had etched her soul into Hange’s heart. She became the singular person that Hange did not want to lose. And so she was afraid, afraid that in opening herself up the world, she would lose the one person that she just couldn't afford to let go of.

Hange found it to be an irony. She rejected this idea yet when she walked away earlier, she had accepted a fate where she handed her off to someone else - to Erwin. She did not understand anything, and the incoherence of it all frustrated her as per usual.

Hange forcefully dragged herself out of the void that was her thoughts and directed her attention to the conversation with Ymir once more, “I’m sorry if this makes you uncomfortable but you mentioned it was… a she?”

Ymir winced, not realizing that she had given that information away. She sighed in resignation, knowing she couldn’t bullshit her way out of this and nodded in response. “Yeah. It’s a girl.” She chuckled bitterly, “You gonna start thinking shit of me, boss?”

Ymir anticipated to see a look of disgust across Hange’s face but she only saw confusion, “Why would I think that way of you?”

She was caught off guard by the question, “Because I’m a woman… admitting that I _care deeply_ about a woman.” Ymir replied, hinting that her care was in a more romantic context than platonic.

Hange turned to the moon for a moment before looking back at Ymir with an unfazed expression, “So?” Ymir’s eyes widened in surprise which made Hange laugh so much that she fell back on the grass.

Ymir couldn’t help the smirk that tugged on her lips as the heavy weight on her shoulders began to ease up. “We have bigger problems than girls who love girls, or boys kissing boys. If anything, I think it’s very brave of you, the both of you - to continue to love even if the world around you doesn’t necessarily approve it.”

Ymir lies back on the grass as well, reaching out to the dark sky where the stars had began to appear. “There’s too much hate going on in this world. I don’t want to deny myself a flicker of happiness.” After a few more minutes of appreciating the view, Hange pulls herself up. “Think it’s time we head for dinner.”

Ymir nods in agreement, pushing off the ground and standing up as well. The two walked back into the castle in silence, the weight of their previous conversation still tensing the air around them. “Your secret is safe with me, Ymir.” Hange mutters, eyes trained on the hallway instead of the cadet.

“Thank you… section commander.” Hange is shocked as it’s probably the first time Ymir had referred to her in that title. She waves the cadet off in embarrassment, “Don’t go soft on me now, cadet. Anyway you should go head to the mess hall.”

“What about you?”

“I’ve got work to do. Erwin’s been on a roll with missions, my paperwork isn’t going to write itself.”

Ymir laughs, “Want me to bring you up some tea and food later?”

Hange smiles at the offer, “Much appreciated.”

With that the two went their separate ways. It didn’t take long for Hange to reach her room. Just as she was about to close the door behind her a deep voice called out, “Ah! Section commander, there you are.” _Erwin._

She fought back the sigh and turned to him, saluting instantly. The moment she turned to him, she was surprised to see Isabel by his side. It had been a while since she came to base and she had assumed that she’d be escorted back to her house by now.

“Commander. Lady Isabel.” She greeted the two.

“To what do I owe this visit?” She inquired.

Erwin clears his throat, “I believe this conversation is better have in your office, section commander.”

Hange understanding the hint of a more confidential conversation, opens the door wider to allow the two entrance. Erwin offers Isabel to walk in first.

Once the three had sat on the couches in Hange’s office, Erwin went straight to business. “Well the most important piece to discuss is that Lady Isabel has agreed to our proposal. Allow me to disclose what that agreement includes.”

While she seemed calm on the outside, Hange was internally defeated at the announcement that Isabel had agreed. Now she was truly doomed to a fate of watching the two dance and share smiles, a sight that will pain her but she can do nothing about.

“Lady Isabel has kindly allowed me to accompany her at social gatherings, generously letting me be the man beside _the woman._ ”

Hange was intrigued in Erwin’s specifically worded statement. He worded it in a sense that she was not _his_ accessory but the complete opposite. She knew that this was probably something the lady took kindly to as she has time and time again expressed her refusal to be seen less by a man, to be nothing more than a hand to hold at their lavishly elegant parties.

“Although I carry the title of commander, I am highly aware that Lady Isabel’s status and label carries more value and as such I give her the freedom to endorse the regiment in my stead. Isabel has agreed to this,” Erwin turns to Isabel seeking confirmation, she nods her head with a smile, urging him to continue.

“Her involvement in our plan is to simply help us gain favour with the nobles as well as the people. Isabel will play it as she sees fit.”

Hange could not hide her surprise at his statement, “You trust her to make the calls?” she winces, realizing how poorly worded her question was.

As Isabel was about to retort, her offense shown on her face, Erwin decided to cut in to defend his comrade. “The section commander meant no harm, _My Lady._ He is quite straightforward and sometimes callous with his words but I assure you that it is **never** in ill-regard.” Erwin turns his head to look at Hange, the silent order instantly received.

She bows her head, fist connecting with her chest where her heart beat. “I deeply apologise if I offended you, Missus. It was not my intention.”

Isabel eyes the section commander for a moment, clearly still hurt. She understood where she was and knew that the soldiers would be wary of her, but she did not expect him out of all people to question her. She was not a half-baked mind and she thought the section commander of all people would know that, after all, they have shared conversations.

And then the bitter reminder hit Isabel. Of course, their shared conversations have been limited, vague in nature. It seemed that everything revolving the two of them was always blur, nothing true or straightforward coming of it. Just like the affections they felt, their conversations were just as unclear.

“I apologise as well. As it is, _I do not know you enough_ \- your behavior and habits included. I should not have been quick to interpret your intentions.” Isabel replies, making the tension grow just even more with the double meaning behind her words. She noticed the way he winced but paid no more attention to it.

Erwin sensing the same tension decided it was best to wrap this conversation up as soon as possible. He had a faint idea about what was going on but it was not his business to snoop in it, he’ll just wait until the three of them - Him, Hange, and Levi - share a drink once more. An intoxicated Hange would have no restraint in divulging this interesting story to them.  
“Now that that’s been settled. Yes, section commander, I have complete and utter faith in Lady Isabel to make the wise decisions that’ll benefit _all of us._ ”

Hange cuts in again, “All of us? May I ask what that means.”

“Surely you did not expect the lady to agree to a negotiation where only we benefit?”

Hange nods, letting Erwin continue. “Of course the lady also has much to benefit from this deal.”

With an inviting hand, Erwin allows Isabel to announce her own terms. “Well, the obvious, this agreement very much allows people to speculate that I am… entertaining a man at the least. This will hopefully make others back off for the time being - my mother included as she is quite… determined now more than ever to find her daughters wealthy suitors.” Isabel shakes in disgust, remembering how her mother had made Eleanor - the youngest of the three - dance with Nile Dok, someone… _older_ than all three. Hange seemed to know what she was thinking as the section commander winced as well.

Isabel eyed her actions, not helping the fond smile that found its way on her face which made the butterflies in Hange’s stomach grow wild once more.

“Since _Erwin_ is the commander. This also means that I’ll have to visit the scouts base more often. This is not an unwelcome circumstance as if you know anything about me, you would know that I’m quite fed up with spending my day to day in the manor or the evenings having to act interested in whatever the people around me are talking about.”

Hange chuckles at the snarky and blatant disgust in Isabel’s words. “Is that all, Missus? Though I must say that you have much to gain from this.”

Isabel heartily laughs and for a moment, the two were back to the night they first met. With easy chatter, smiles, and laughs shared. Nothing restrained or trained in their behavior, just blissfully enjoying each other’s company. Erwin watched the ease with which the two interacted despite his presence, he could not help but be appreciative, as well as give more reason as to why this gamble of his should be played.

If it meant that he could see this side of his friend; the easygoing, free of worry Hange. Then he would gladly play along and take every risk. He would do this, so that one day she could live her truth in this world instead of hiding in the darkness of her lies.

_This is what he was fighting for._

“Actually, there’s one more thing.” Erwin announces, cutting their laughter short.

Hange raises an eyebrow at him, “Lady Isabel’s final demand,” Erwin pauses for a moment.

“That she be allowed to join the scouts regiment in some form.” With this, Hange’s eyes widened in complete shock, caught off-guard by the heavy demand the lady had made that Erwin apparently obliged with.  
“If I may ask, sir. What does that entail?”

“She may join in training alongside the female squad, as long as you deem it reasonably within her skill set. If she improves, she is allowed to join the more complicated training. She will also assist you in your research, I know that you are in dire need of assistance for that beyond Berner, I think Lady Isabel would be fit for the role as her interest lies in reading and learning - just like you.”

It was reasonable, even Hange had to admit that. But she feared working with the Lady so closely as what Erwin was suggesting - ordering from her. She knew that Erwin would pay no attention to her fear nor her emotional reasoning behind refusing this, so with a defeated sigh, Hange nodded her head at the final list of demands.

“Alright Erwin. _I’ll trust you with this._ ” something she has told him time and time again when he came to her with a gamble or a mission. Erwin nodded in appreciation.

“That is all for this conversation, though I have one more favour to ask.” Hange arches an eyebrow in inquiry.

“Lady Isabel told me that you rode here on horseback. As such, I’d like you to escort her back to her residence the same way.”

Hange nodded, and with that their conversation concluded.

They all walked towards the door to exit Hange’s room. As Erwin opened it, a girl stood at the opposite end - Ymir.

Ymir’s eyes widened as Isabel’s narrowed though no one saw it.

“I-”

“Yes, cadet?” Erwin asks, his tone authoritative. Typical Commander.

Ymir’s mouth opened and closed a few times, not knowing what to say, she composed herself with a deep inhale. “I brought the section commander some tea and food since he wasn't at dinner.” she explains without stuttering, raising her hands that held the cup and plate respectively.

“Thank you, cadet. Though I must apologise that I’m about to go off-grounds and won’t be back until later on.” Hange joins in, leaving Isabel’s side which made the girl’s mouth pull into a frown, one that Ymir caught sight of.

Hange takes hold of Ymir’s shoulders and directs her out and farther away from Erwin and Isabel. “What you want me to do with this, boss?”

“Put it in my room of course. We aren’t supposed to waste good food.”

Ymir snorts, “You sure? Girly looked like she going to murder me with her eyes if I took one more step.” she teased.  
Hange’s confusion was seen on her face, eyebrows furrowing, not understanding what Ymir was on about. Ymir looked dumbfounded, “Are you telling me you didn’t notice?”

Hange rolls her eyes, “Sorry. I was too busy trying to help you get out of that mess.”

While Hange did want to continue their conversation and understand what the freckled girl meant, she remembered that she still had orders to fulfill, and that a certain commander and lady were watching them from a distance. With a curt nod, “Put that in my room, okay? Thanks Ymir.”

With that, she leaves Ymir and rejoins the two. After a few pleasantries, Erwin bid farewell to the lady and they headed to the stables to retrieve their companions on tonight’s travel.

Hange was busy fiddling with Nova’s reigns when she noticed Isabel deeply sigh while looking at Marquis, her horse. “Is there a problem, Miss?”

Isabel huffed out in annoyance, meeting the section commander’s concerned stare. “It seems today’s events - a whole tour of the headquarters to be specific…” Isabel’s voice grew silent with each word, embarrassed to admit the reason behind her frustration.

Hange looked on in anticipation, encouraging the lady to continue with her eyes. Isabel turned away from his stare and quietly muttered, “Has left me more tired than I expected…”

Because of how faintly she had said it, Hange did not catch on and decided to come closer to Isabel. “Could you say that again?”

Isabel groans, not wishing to repeat herself with a roll of her eye which made the section commander laugh at her. “I’m more tired than I expected… and I’m having a hard time... getting on my horse.”

The lady was beyond embarrassed at her own admission. She was trained all her life to keep her emotions in check, never to let a sign of nervousness or embarrassment come across her features. But around the section commander that conditioned behavior left no trace as she turned into a squirming nervous wreck or a playful girl. Isabel’s blush intensified as she looked away from him.

Hange grinned, finding her confession and behavior to be cute. “Would you like me to help you up?”

Her blush only grew worse, with a barely visible nod, Isabel moved to stand in front of her horse. She felt his hands ghost by her hips and held her breath, realizing what he was about to do. “May I?” He asked.

Fearing the betrayal of her voice or breathing, she chose to simply nod her head. She felt his hands tentatively hold her by the hips before his grip tightened just slightly to make sure he had a good hold on her. “Jump on three.” He instructed.

He helped her up on her horse with ease, his hands lightly splayed on the arch of her back to make sure that she didn’t fall off. “Thank you, section commander.”

He smiled at her and there it was again, the damned butterflies in her stomach along with the warmth that spread across her chest, the fast beat of her heart.

She watched him with gentle eyes, he who stood below her on the ground with a smile on his face.

 _Isabel was deeply infatuated with the section commander._ This she knew to be true in this exact moment. It was no longer something she could deny nor something she could fight.

She was just talking about keeping her heart guarded where the section commander was concerned, yet how is it that with one look he managed to melt her defenses down? There was no point in questioning it now just as it was pointless to deny what she felt for him.

She was allowed to like him was she not? _Even if he didn’t feel the same way?_

She turned away from him with a blush. Hange stood there for a second more, her feet refusing to move away from the beauty that stood before her.

With a shake of her head, she forced herself to get on her own horse.

The ride was spent in silence, the pair unsure how to initiate conversation - something that used to come easily for them.

When she had had enough of the silence, Isabel turned her attention to the sky, a smile instantly displayed on her lips. “Just like that night…” she mutters more to herself though Hange heard it clearly.

She also turned towards the moon - the view presented to her leaving the section commander astonished.

Isabel’s back was turned to her as she continued to watch the night sky. Hange may not see her face but she knew, she knew that there’d be a smile graciously placed on it. She closed her eyes to envision it and she could not help her own smile, tears brimmed her eyes - she was so overwhelmed.

Overwhelmed with the fondness and admiration she held for Isabel. It was through sheer will that her tears did not flow down her face, Hange just sat there, watching the view in front of her. Of Isabel who looked kindly upon the night sky.

While she sat there admiring her own view, pleading her system to etch this view in her mind forever. Reminiscent of a life that she could live if she willed it.

“Isabel…” Hange called out, surprising herself in the process.

The lady turned around and she saw the image she was just envisioning. Her freckles that danced along her cheeks that put the stars in the sky to shame, the moonlight illuminating around her, the smile that could be found on her lips.

But there was something that Hange had not expected, the tears that cascaded down her cheeks. She was brought back to her senses on high alert, concern shining through as she saw the girl cry. “Why are you crying?” She worriedly asked.

Isabel shook her head, not wiping the tears away, her smile though still fond now showing faint bitterness in it. “I was reminded of that night and for a moment I was happy.”

“Then why are you crying?”

“Because all I want... is to relive that night.”

Hange’s breath hitched in her throat. She had spent so much time wanting to relive that night as well, to have someone see her even in the shadows and join her - even when that person clearly belonged in the light. She wanted nothing more than to relive that night, have one more foolish conversation, one more smile, one more dance, one more kiss – just one more moment where only Hange Zoe and Isabel Black mattered.

In an instant, she made up her mind. Just one more night. She’d let her walls come crashing down one last time, forget about all the burdens and lies she had to live with.

Just one more moment where her entire focus and soul belonged to Isabel Black.

“Would you give me the pleasure to relive that night then, My Light?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, my loves!! I apologize if it took a while to update this, I had a slight writer's block and then I just kept coming up with drafts that I didn't like. I'm sorry if this chapter isn't to your standard but I'm afraid this is the best I can offer right now. :(
> 
> Anyway, I'm so emo over the rollercoaster of emotions this chapter brought me and I hope you somewhat feel the same way.  
> I don't think I'll be able to update for a while since I want to take a short break so I can give you the story you deserve instead of forcing myself to write something mediocre, hope you all understand! <3


End file.
